Good morning and greetings, three-day weekend fans. According to my Selena Gomez calendar, today is Presidents’ Day, an American holiday that is celebrated on the third Monday in February, although it is still officially called “Washington’s Birthday” by the federal government and survivors of the Battle of Saratoga.

President George Washington’s actual date of birth is February 22, but the holiday was moved in 1971 in an attempt to create more three-day weekends for the nation’s workers and get Abraham Lincoln in on the action. Presidents’ Day is now viewed as a day to celebrate all U.S. presidents past and present, with the exception of George Bush.

President’s Day may just be one holiday in February, but in a great American tradition, retailers and dispensaries use it as an excuse for sales all month. It’s the first major sales day of the year by the retail industry, and you can save on big ticket items like cars, computers and vaporizers to enhance your medicinal experience.

But l say forget the memory foam mattress and get into the intended spirit of the occasion by honoring our presidents. So today we’ll take a look at some wild and wacky things you may not have known about a couple of these icons, courtesy of the staff at the National Constitution and Manali Oakat at buzzle.com.

Let’s start with our first Commander-in-Chief. George Washington was a farmer, and was way ahead of his time as he grew marijuana and promoted it’s growth. However, the crop was grown mainly for its usage as industrial value as hemp, soil stabilization and enhancing Saturday morning cartoons. He is also credited with introducing the mule to American farms, which comes as a real kick in the ass.

G.W. never wore a powdered wig, as was the custom for men at the time, preferring a Yankee baseball hat. He adored Derek Jeter. Washington never shook hands with people, preferring the high five, low five or chest bump.

He was homeschooled by his father and brother and never took the SAT’s or went to college. He frequently got confused with spellings having letters ‘i’ and ‘e’. He loved ice cream, with his favorite being Ben and Jerry’s Chunky Monkey and Cherry Garcia. He was the only president who never lived in Washingon D. C. preferring to commute by boat from his home in Mount Vernon to the Oval Office.

Fox hunting and fishing were his favorite sports, as he loved anything with a hook in its mouth. He bred hound dogs that he treated like members of the family. He gave them the names like True Love, Sweet Lips and Ben Franklin. He had six white horses in his stable and had their teeth brushed and flossed everyday. He was a big fan of Betsy Ross and the Supremes.

Washington’s image is a National symbol for the United States. His picture is on the dollar bill and was the first President to be on a postage stamp. His bust has been carved on Mount Rushmore. The state of Washington is the only state to be named after an American, with the exception of Esther Rolle who played Florida on ‘Good Times.’

George Washington used to snore loudly. This was the first reported case of sleep apnea. He suffered from toothaches throughout his life. At the time of his inauguration, Washington had only one tooth as all his teeth were pulled by the time he was the President. At times he wore dentures and was a spokesman for Polident.

He never told a lie as he admitted to once chopping down his father’s cherry tree, Before he died, he told his doctor, “I die hard, but I am not afraid to go. His final words were.”Tis well and I just don’t know where the next season of Homeland is headed. ”

On to our 16th president. Abraham Lincoln was born in a small one room cabin and given no middle name by his parents. As a child he had an averson to killing animals and never hunted or fished. People thought he was lazy, as during those times frontier families depended on fish and game to survive. Often a young Abe could be seen shooting the breeze with baby squirrels and chipmunks.

Lincoln only had 18 months of formal education, including summer school. He loved reading, education and taking Berlitz classes. He practiced law without a degree and was very disorganized. He carried important papers in his stovepipe hat so he wouldn’t misplace them, along with his driver’s license and a pack of chiclets.

Lincoln and his wife would have four sons, but only one of whom would survive past the age of 18. Robert Lincoln, the only son who would live to raise a family of his own was almost killed at a train station in New Jersey near the start of the Civil War. He slipped from a platform and would have fallen in front of the train had he not been grabbed by the collar and pulled to safety by Edwin Booth. Later Edwin’s brother, John Wilkes, would shoot and kill Lincoln, becoming the first president to be assassinated.

Lincoln was the only president to ever obtain a U.S. patent for the invention of the Lincoln Logs. He was the first major leader to feel that women should be allowed the right to vote. He was in the forefront of American Politics for just six short years, but in that time he became the most hated and the most loved president in the history of the United States. He was credited with tearing the country apart and bringing it back together. And for all he did, they only put him on the penny.

He never belonged to an organized church but read the Bible and the New York Post daily. He was a simple man who didn’t drink, smoke or chew tobacco. He hated being called Abe, as he preferred being called by his last name or the “‘White Mambo.” He established Thanksgiving as a national holiday. His cat ate at the White House dinner table and loved Little Friskies.

He was the first president with a beard. His Gettysburg Address, made at the end of the Civil War that ended slavery, is one of the most oft repeated speeches throughout history. It started out “Four score and seven years,” which ironically, is how I started out my first blog post.

If Honest Abe had been asked about today’s Tea Party, he would have responded “Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.” Had he had the opportunity to read my writing, this would have been his response. “You can fool all the people some of the time, and some people all of the time, but you cannot fool all the people all the time.” So I continue on.

For today’s photo lineup, we are returning to the evening of November 14. The place was Natural Bridges State Beach. Expectations were low on this night but then things went surprisingly well, with the sky turning different shades of red and pink, which was certainly preferable to the lighter shade of pale

February has been a great month for shooting sunrises and sunsets, and they are starting to stack up on my computer like 747’s on the runway at JFK International. So check for times and dates at a theatre near you.

On to some late night humor. “Norway currently leads the medal count with 12, followed by the Netherland and Canada, followed then by white-sylvania and albino-stan. The Winter Games are really the only games that to do well, you have to look exactly like the surface you’re competing on.” –Jon Stewart “Bob Costas had to take a break from hosting the Olympics coverage due to an eye infection. In fact, his eyes are so bloodshot, he’s been made an honorary member of the U.S. snowboarding team.” – Conan O’Brien

“They are very upfront about the fact that you should have no expectations of privacy if you go there to Sochi. The phones immediately are hacked, your computers are hacked, the rooms are bugged; one hotel – their slogan is ‘we’ll leave the mic on for you.'” –Bill Maher “It’s Fashion Week in New York City. I was walking to work today and I thought oh, my God, there’s a giant icicle. But it was a frozen supermodel.” – David Letterman

“Yep, tonight is the 969th and final episode of “Late Night.” Or as my dad put it, “Couldn’t make it to a thousand, huh? Quitter.” We’ve done over 10,000 monologue jokes over the last five years. And in case you missed any of them, the best way I could summarize those jokes is that Joe Biden needed Obamacare after Anthony Weiner texted Justin Bieber a picture of Chris Christie dating a Kardashian on the Jersey Shore — with Rob Ford. – Jimmy Fallon

So not only is February 22 the birthday of George Washington and Dr. J, Julius Erving, but it is also the day my brother Paul came flying out the chute, so birthday wishes go out to him while he still in his 50’s.

We’ll catch you turning 60 after gaining worldwide fame by appearing on three consecutive Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issues back in the late 70’s and early 80’s. Aloha, mahalo and later, Christie Brinkley fans.

Good morning and greetings, electoral college fans. Now that the presidential campaign that would never end is behind us, we can go back to focusing on the important things, like the recovery from Hurricane Sandy, kick starting the economy and who’s going to coach the Lakers.

But before we leave the lovely grounds of the electoral college, let’s reflect a moment on the six billion dollars spent on this electorial debacle. Could there have been a better way for these quadrillions to have been better spent? Health care? Food for the hungry? A three day, two night romantic getaway vacation at The Venetian Hotel and Casino on the Vegas strip?

As brought up by historian David McCullough, for all this dinero, nothing memorable was said during the campaign. Never have so few spent so much for so little. Of course, no one will forget the incredibly ignorant and insensitive comments about rape uttered by Todd Akin and Richard Mourdock, which still has Republican party leaders cringing.

So President Obama will remain in the West Wing for another four years, with the country remaining as divided as my sixth grade notebook binder. As a seasoned political observer chimed in from the blue grass state last week, “John Boehner is still orange and Mitch McConnell must go. And take Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi with them. We need new blood in Washington.”

And let’s not forget Super Pac boy Karl Rove, who David Letterman referred to on post election night as “that tubby little weasel.” This top Republican strategist, who had predicted a landslide for his party, blew $300 million on Republican losers. It couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy. Well, maybe that hate mongering Rush Limbaugh.

So for now, Michelle’s hubby remains as our 44th president. We know that President Obama is lefty, loves to play basketball and was either born in Hawaii or Kenya. So that got me to thinking, what things might we not know about our previous commanders-in-chiefs? Well, thanks to the folks at www.randomhistory.com, we’re going to take a
stroll down memory lane and look at some fun facts about our previous presidents.

Abraham Lincoln was the only U.S. president who was also a licensed bartender and was co-owner of a saloon in Springfield, Illinois. This drinking establishment is where he came up the inspiration for the famous opening line of the Gettysburg Address, “Four score and seven drinks ago…”

George Washington refused to accept his presidential salary, which was $25,000 a year after taxes. Washington never lived in the White House, as the capital was in Philadelphia. While in Washington, he stayed at a Motel 6. He was the first person they left the light on for.

Lincoln Logs were named after Abraham Lincoln and the log cabin where he was born. Rumor has it that John F. Kennedy was the inspiration behind the naming of the Erector Sets, a toy that consisted of nuts, bolts and a lot of screwing.

Thomas Jefferson and John Adams once traveled to Stratford-upon-Avon to visit Shakespeare’s birthplace. While there, they took a knife to one of Shakespeare’s chairs so they could take home some wood chips as souvenirs. Fortunately, Shakespeare was not sitting in the chair at the time.

James Madison and Thomas Jefferson were once arrested together for taking a carriage ride in the countryside of Vermont on a Sunday, which violated the laws of that state. However, they denied anything improper occurred on this outing, after which they returned home to watch the first season of “Glee” on NetFlix.

James Buchanan was the only bachelor president and was virtually inseparable from William R. King, a senator from Alabama, earning the pair the nickname “Miss Nancy and Aunt Fancy.” Andrew Johnson is the only tailor ever to be president. As president, he would only wear suits that he made himself, which might have inspired the quote, “Politicians, like underwear, should be changed often, and for the same reasons. Whoa.

James Garfield was the first president to ever talk on the phone and hear the phrase, “Due to unusually high call volume, our wait time is greater than expected.” When he spoke to Alexander Graham Bell, who was at the other end 13 miles away, he channeled the Doors’ Jim Morrison with the words, ‘Hello, I love you, won’t you tell me your name.”

Twenty-ninth president Warren Harding repeatedly made love to a young girl, Nan Britton, in a White House closet. On one occasion, Secret Service agents had to stop his wife from beating down the closet door, which spawned the famous line from Fats Domino, “I hear you knocking, but you can’t come in.”

After President Bush Sr. vomited on the Japanese Prime Minister, a new
word, ‘bushusuru’ entered the Japanese language, meaning “to do the
Bush thing,” or to publicly vomit. Bush blamed it on some bad mu shu pork.

Lyndon Baines Johnson affectionately called the many women he slept with his “harem.” He had a 24 second clock and buzzer system installed that rang inside the Oval Office so that Secret Service could warn him when Lady Bird or Larry Bird were coming.

Ulysses S. Grant smoked at least 20 cigars a day and, after his victory over the south, was sent more than 10,000 cigars by a grateful nation. He later died of throat cancer. Which brings to mind the line uttered by Groucho Marx when told by a contestant on his game show that she had nineteen children, “Hey, lady, I love my cigar but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.”

JFK was the the first Boy Scout to become president but behaved more like an eager beaver while in the Oval Office. He most likely had the most active extramarital sex life of any president as he allegedly slept with Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield, Audrey Hepburn, Angie Dickinson, stripper Blaze Starr, Marlene Dietrich, White House staffers, interns, life guards, secretaries, tour guides, stewardess, coal miners, dental hygenists, census takers and the Andrew Sisters.

And finally, William Harrison holds the record for the longest inauguration speech in history at 8,578 words long and one hour and 40 minutes. Unfortunately, he gave the speech during bad weather and a month later, he was dead from pneumonia, making his the shortest presidency on record. And who said sticks and stones can break my
bones but words can never hurt me?

For today’s photo array we are heading up to UC Santa Cruz to check out some presidential timber. There is a variety of different trees on campus, but the star of the show are the redwoods, with incredible groves located all throughout the cluster colleges. There are beautiful trails surrounding the university, which ranks as one of
the most beautiful campuses in the country. The views of Monterey Bay from the east fieldhouse, where I received much of my college education, are breathtaking.

On to the late night. “Congratulations to President Obama on being re-elected president of the United States. Turns out it is not all bad news for the Republicans. It seems that depression is covered by Obamacare.” –Jay Leno “In his victory speech last night, President Obama told his daughters that they would not be getting another dog. When asked why, the president said, ‘Because I just made Mitt Romney my bitch.” Yesterday was a historic day. Everyone marked it in different ways. A Kenyan woman gave birth to twin boys and named them Barack Obama and Mitt Romney. Obviously she named the one that came out second Mitt Romney.” –Conan O’Brien

“Well, it’s over, and as usual, the guy from Kenya won. Mitt Romney was very gracious in his remarks in his concession speech. Shortly after Mitt Romney conceded, Paul Ryan was untied and set free. Mayor Bloomberg announced that Sunday’s marathon will go ahead as scheduled. Immediately afterward, Paul Ryan announced he finished in 2 hours, 2 minutes, and 12 seconds.” –David Letterman

“Obama’s been getting bipartisan praise for how he handled the hurricane. Even Fox News tried to praise it. Of course, their heart’s not in it. The best they could do was Pat Buchanan said, ‘You’re doing a heck of a job, Brownie.’ On Fox News they’re obsessed
with Benghazi. They want answers. They’re like a teen boy reaching into a pair of panties for the first time. They’re not sure what it is, they’re not sure where it is but they know there’s something in there and they’re going to find it.” –Bill Maher

“Colorado and Washington have become the first states to legalize the recreational use of marijuana. That’s a big deal because here in California, you can use marijuana legally only if you receive it for a fake medical condition.” –Jimmy Kimmel “Last night I answered the door and there was a kid lying on the porch. He was playing dead. I
said: ‘What are you supposed to be?’ He said: ‘the economy.'” –Jay Leno

So let’s hope the Republicans and Democrats can bury the hatchet and come together like good boys and girls so we can move ahead as a nation. And don’t forget the poor folks who lost their homes or power in Hurricane Sandy or our troops and their families. It will be a while for either to recover from the devastation.

So my 350th post is in the books. We’ll catch you showing everyone why you were the number one pick in last year’s NFL draft and have your team in playoff contention this season. Aloha, mahalo and later, Andrew Luck fans.