Good morning and greetings, electoral college fans. Now that the presidential campaign that would never end is behind us, we can go back to focusing on the important things, like the recovery from Hurricane Sandy, kick starting the economy and who’s going to coach the Lakers.

But before we leave the lovely grounds of the electoral college, let’s reflect a moment on the six billion dollars spent on this electorial debacle. Could there have been a better way for these quadrillions to have been better spent? Health care? Food for the hungry? A three day, two night romantic getaway vacation at The Venetian Hotel and Casino on the Vegas strip?

As brought up by historian David McCullough, for all this dinero, nothing memorable was said during the campaign. Never have so few spent so much for so little. Of course, no one will forget the incredibly ignorant and insensitive comments about rape uttered by Todd Akin and Richard Mourdock, which still has Republican party leaders cringing.

So President Obama will remain in the West Wing for another four years, with the country remaining as divided as my sixth grade notebook binder. As a seasoned political observer chimed in from the blue grass state last week, “John Boehner is still orange and Mitch McConnell must go. And take Harry Reid and Nancy Pelosi with them. We need new blood in Washington.”

And let’s not forget Super Pac boy Karl Rove, who David Letterman referred to on post election night as “that tubby little weasel.” This top Republican strategist, who had predicted a landslide for his party, blew $300 million on Republican losers. It couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy. Well, maybe that hate mongering Rush Limbaugh.

So for now, Michelle’s hubby remains as our 44th president. We know that President Obama is lefty, loves to play basketball and was either born in Hawaii or Kenya. So that got me to thinking, what things might we not know about our previous commanders-in-chiefs? Well, thanks to the folks at www.randomhistory.com, we’re going to take a
stroll down memory lane and look at some fun facts about our previous presidents.

Abraham Lincoln was the only U.S. president who was also a licensed bartender and was co-owner of a saloon in Springfield, Illinois. This drinking establishment is where he came up the inspiration for the famous opening line of the Gettysburg Address, “Four score and seven drinks ago…”

George Washington refused to accept his presidential salary, which was $25,000 a year after taxes. Washington never lived in the White House, as the capital was in Philadelphia. While in Washington, he stayed at a Motel 6. He was the first person they left the light on for.

Lincoln Logs were named after Abraham Lincoln and the log cabin where he was born. Rumor has it that John F. Kennedy was the inspiration behind the naming of the Erector Sets, a toy that consisted of nuts, bolts and a lot of screwing.

Thomas Jefferson and John Adams once traveled to Stratford-upon-Avon to visit Shakespeare’s birthplace. While there, they took a knife to one of Shakespeare’s chairs so they could take home some wood chips as souvenirs. Fortunately, Shakespeare was not sitting in the chair at the time.

James Madison and Thomas Jefferson were once arrested together for taking a carriage ride in the countryside of Vermont on a Sunday, which violated the laws of that state. However, they denied anything improper occurred on this outing, after which they returned home to watch the first season of “Glee” on NetFlix.

James Buchanan was the only bachelor president and was virtually inseparable from William R. King, a senator from Alabama, earning the pair the nickname “Miss Nancy and Aunt Fancy.” Andrew Johnson is the only tailor ever to be president. As president, he would only wear suits that he made himself, which might have inspired the quote, “Politicians, like underwear, should be changed often, and for the same reasons. Whoa.

James Garfield was the first president to ever talk on the phone and hear the phrase, “Due to unusually high call volume, our wait time is greater than expected.” When he spoke to Alexander Graham Bell, who was at the other end 13 miles away, he channeled the Doors’ Jim Morrison with the words, ‘Hello, I love you, won’t you tell me your name.”

Twenty-ninth president Warren Harding repeatedly made love to a young girl, Nan Britton, in a White House closet. On one occasion, Secret Service agents had to stop his wife from beating down the closet door, which spawned the famous line from Fats Domino, “I hear you knocking, but you can’t come in.”

After President Bush Sr. vomited on the Japanese Prime Minister, a new
word, ‘bushusuru’ entered the Japanese language, meaning “to do the
Bush thing,” or to publicly vomit. Bush blamed it on some bad mu shu pork.

Lyndon Baines Johnson affectionately called the many women he slept with his “harem.” He had a 24 second clock and buzzer system installed that rang inside the Oval Office so that Secret Service could warn him when Lady Bird or Larry Bird were coming.

Ulysses S. Grant smoked at least 20 cigars a day and, after his victory over the south, was sent more than 10,000 cigars by a grateful nation. He later died of throat cancer. Which brings to mind the line uttered by Groucho Marx when told by a contestant on his game show that she had nineteen children, “Hey, lady, I love my cigar but I take it out of my mouth once in a while.”

JFK was the the first Boy Scout to become president but behaved more like an eager beaver while in the Oval Office. He most likely had the most active extramarital sex life of any president as he allegedly slept with Marilyn Monroe, Jayne Mansfield, Audrey Hepburn, Angie Dickinson, stripper Blaze Starr, Marlene Dietrich, White House staffers, interns, life guards, secretaries, tour guides, stewardess, coal miners, dental hygenists, census takers and the Andrew Sisters.

And finally, William Harrison holds the record for the longest inauguration speech in history at 8,578 words long and one hour and 40 minutes. Unfortunately, he gave the speech during bad weather and a month later, he was dead from pneumonia, making his the shortest presidency on record. And who said sticks and stones can break my
bones but words can never hurt me?

For today’s photo array we are heading up to UC Santa Cruz to check out some presidential timber. There is a variety of different trees on campus, but the star of the show are the redwoods, with incredible groves located all throughout the cluster colleges. There are beautiful trails surrounding the university, which ranks as one of
the most beautiful campuses in the country. The views of Monterey Bay from the east fieldhouse, where I received much of my college education, are breathtaking.

On to the late night. “Congratulations to President Obama on being re-elected president of the United States. Turns out it is not all bad news for the Republicans. It seems that depression is covered by Obamacare.” –Jay Leno “In his victory speech last night, President Obama told his daughters that they would not be getting another dog. When asked why, the president said, ‘Because I just made Mitt Romney my bitch.” Yesterday was a historic day. Everyone marked it in different ways. A Kenyan woman gave birth to twin boys and named them Barack Obama and Mitt Romney. Obviously she named the one that came out second Mitt Romney.” –Conan O’Brien

“Well, it’s over, and as usual, the guy from Kenya won. Mitt Romney was very gracious in his remarks in his concession speech. Shortly after Mitt Romney conceded, Paul Ryan was untied and set free. Mayor Bloomberg announced that Sunday’s marathon will go ahead as scheduled. Immediately afterward, Paul Ryan announced he finished in 2 hours, 2 minutes, and 12 seconds.” –David Letterman

“Obama’s been getting bipartisan praise for how he handled the hurricane. Even Fox News tried to praise it. Of course, their heart’s not in it. The best they could do was Pat Buchanan said, ‘You’re doing a heck of a job, Brownie.’ On Fox News they’re obsessed
with Benghazi. They want answers. They’re like a teen boy reaching into a pair of panties for the first time. They’re not sure what it is, they’re not sure where it is but they know there’s something in there and they’re going to find it.” –Bill Maher

“Colorado and Washington have become the first states to legalize the recreational use of marijuana. That’s a big deal because here in California, you can use marijuana legally only if you receive it for a fake medical condition.” –Jimmy Kimmel “Last night I answered the door and there was a kid lying on the porch. He was playing dead. I
said: ‘What are you supposed to be?’ He said: ‘the economy.'” –Jay Leno

So let’s hope the Republicans and Democrats can bury the hatchet and come together like good boys and girls so we can move ahead as a nation. And don’t forget the poor folks who lost their homes or power in Hurricane Sandy or our troops and their families. It will be a while for either to recover from the devastation.

So my 350th post is in the books. We’ll catch you showing everyone why you were the number one pick in last year’s NFL draft and have your team in playoff contention this season. Aloha, mahalo and later, Andrew Luck fans.

Good morning and greetings, Presidential Election fans. Wow, what a wild and tragic week we had running up to Tuesday’s election. Hurricane Sandy wreaked unbelievable havoc and destruction along the east coast, with the most severe damage occurring in my home state of New Jersey and New York. These two states and the New York Jets were declared a state of emergency while requesting federal assistance about what to do with Tim Tebow.

This incredibly powerful freak storm left behind a surreal landscape of devastation. We’re talking homes destroyed, towns under water, millions without power and heat, the New York subway system ground to a halt, a rising death toll and Halloween being cancelled in many places. So much for eat, drink and be scary. There was talk of cancelling the election, as how were people going to get to the polls? By canoe?

The final word on Sandy comes from Yankee fans, who said if the storm had been named Hurricane A-Rod, it wouldn’t have hit anything.

But we are still on track to vote to see who will occupy the White House for the next four years. So with some big help from the folks at randomhistory.com, let’s take a look at some fun facts about previous presidential elections. Or as either Donald Trump or his hairdresser once said, “How come we choose from just two people to run for president and 50 for Miss America?”

The first official presidential election in the U.S. took place in 1779, with George Washington becoming our first Commander-in-Chief. While in office, the Father of our Country did not chop down any cherry trees, refused to serve a third term and made history by becoming the first president not to blame his troubles on the previous administration.

Under the heading of “I did not know that,” prior to the 12th Amendment of the Constitution in 1804, the presidential candidate who received the second highest number of electorial votes was named the vice-president. The oldest presidential candidate to be elected was Ronald Reagan at age 69, while the youngest was John F. Kennedy at 43. If he had been elected in 2008, John McCain would have take over the title of oldest elected president at age 172, er, 72 years old.

In the 1984 presidential election, Reagan received both the highest number of popular votes (54,455,075) and the highest number of electoral votes (525) in history. As a Hollywood actor, Ronnie once played the role of football star George Gipp in “Knute Rockne, All American.” Because of this, I would tell my son before he stepped onto the floor before a big game, “Sometime when the team is up against it and the breaks are beating the boys, tell them to go out there with all they’ve got and win just one for the Gipper.’

The first general election presidential debate was held on September 26, 1960, between John F. Kennedy and Richard Nixon. Prior to this, presidential candidates occasionally debated, but never on TV. Tricky Dick had not completely recovered from a hospital stay and looked pale, tired and sickly. He also refused to wear any makeup, and as a result, he had a heavy five o’clock shadow look on the black-and-white TV screens from that era. JFK, by contrast, was tan, confident and relaxed with Marilyn Monore sitting in his lap during the debate. For Nixon, it was a Watergate,er, watershed moment.

The presidential election is traditionally held on the Tuesday after the first Monday in November. Or in the words of Gregg Allman, “They call it stormy Monday, but Tuesday is just as bad.” November was chosen as the election month because it was a convenient time for farmers, when the weather was still nice enough to travel to the county seat, as the bulk of their harvest chores and Halloween trick-or-treating was done.

The Obama-McCain 2008 presidential election was the first time in U.S. history when two sitting senators, although McCain was probably dozing, ran against each other for president. Only two women have ever won the nomination of a major party in a U.S. presidential election: Geraldine Ferraro was the Democratic vice-presidential nominee in 1984, and Sarah Palin was the 2008 Republican vice-presidential nominee. However, Palin was the only one who could see Russia from her house.

In 2000, Al Gore won the popular vote but lost the election to George Bush when the Supremely Inept Court stopped the Florida recount of ballots, giving George W. the state’s 25 electoral votes, for a total of 271 to Gore’s 255. This went down as the biggest heist in history until Saddam Hussein’s ordered his son to rip off $1 billion from Iraq’s Central Bank just hours before the U.S. began bombing Baghdad.

So let’s end with the following oaths. “I do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my ability to preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.” And more importantly, I’m Geoffrey Gilbert and I approve this blog.

For today’s photo recap we are going back to the lovely evening of October 7. The clouds were lining up nicely as I hit Stockton Avenue for the sunset cruise, and as this day turned into night, no man nor beast walked away disappointed. Or to quote the great Woody Allen, “Today I saw a red and yellow sunset and thought, how insignificant I am! Of course, I thought that yesterday too, and it rained.”

On to some late night. “Halloween is a day when we all get to fool people into thinking we’re someone else. Or as Mitt Romney calls it, campaigning. We had the last presidential debate. A very subdued Mitt Romney. If you saw it, Obama would talk, and then Mitt would say, ‘what he said, but from a white guy.’ In the last three weeks, Mitt Romney has come out against tax cuts for the rich, against war, and suddenly for regulations, for teachers, for auto bailouts, for the UN, for birth control, for foreign aid. And what I love is that at this point it’s too late for the Tea Party to do anything about this except act like they’re okay with it. At this point they’re at this point they’re like Jerry Sandusky’s wife.” –Bill Maher

“Michelle Obama is with us tonight. She’ll encourage us to vote early. Most Republicans are opposed, because they believe that voting starts at conception.” –Jimmy Kimmel “Today Colin Powell endorsed Barack Obama for president. This news surprised many elderly Americans who thought they were the same person.” –Craig Ferguson “The debates are over. All that’s left right now is to set up and rig the voting machines.” –David Letterman

“Michael Brown, the former director of FEMA who was forced to resign after Hurricane Katrina, has criticized the president. He said Obama may have acted too quickly this time — instead of taking the wait-and-do-nothing approach that worked so well during Katrina.” –Jimmy Kimmel “Donald Trump, did you see him today? He was giving candy only to kids who could show their birth certificate and their school records.” –Jay Leno “President Obama now has a 52-point lead with Hispanics. However, Mitt Romney has a 90-point lead with the people who hire Hispanics.” –Conan O’Brien

“The hurricane has interrupted the presidential campaign. Both presidential candidates are taking measures to prepare for Hurricane Sandy. President Obama is staying in Washington to coordinate relief efforts. And Mitt Romney is moving his smaller homes into his larger home.” –Conan O’Brien “This storm could mean the biggest power outage since the Yankees in the playoffs. Economic losses could reach $20 billion. And most of that is in paper towels.” –David Letterman

So that’s our election day special. Birthday wishes go out to my old backcourt running mate, Aromas’s own Doug MacKinnon. In my greatest days of basketball glory, Doug was right beside me, picking and rolling, as our opponents were helpless to stop us. The bigger they were, the harder they fell. We were legends in our own minds. Now we both have great futures behind us.

So remember to vote early and vote often. We’ll catch you being named last season’s sixth man of the year and alongside Linsanity, exploding out of the blocks this season with your new Rocket team. Aloha, mahalo and later, James Harden fans.