Good morning and greetings, September fans. A new month is now upon us, which means for many, August is a fleeting memory of summer vacation family fun. Or as writer Robert Orben put it, “A vacation is having nothing to do and all day to do it in.”

I would say that pretty much describes my level of activity while on holiday, as I try to stay as active as a young veal. However, those calves probably don’t awake early in the morning to shoot the tropical sunrise, so I guess you’d say I’m slightly more motivated than my milk-fed friends.

So back in August, when I was a much younger and a whole lot paler, the Gilbert family took their annual pilgrimage to the South Pacific. When on vacation, we are very concerned with having the choice of numerous activities to go along with a flourishing nightlife. That is why we chose the Garden Isle of Kauai, where the bars and hibiscus flowers close up at 3 pm.

When people talk about Kauai, they think of the Princeville, the lovely sands of Hanelei Bay and the bustling south shore of Poipu Beach. And that’s why we choose to vacation in the lovely isolation of Anahola, which in Hawaiian means “no reception.” It’s 110 miles northwest of Honolulu on the northeast shore. If you like to be alone on a golden sand beach with your thoughts, DNA and sunburn, then this is place to be.

Unlike other beaches on the island that are written about extensively in all the tourist literature, you have to look through a microscope to see any mention of Anahola. And you don’t have to wake up early to make sure the parking lot isn’t filled. We come and go to this beautifully crescent shaped beach all day and rarely see a soul. To me, that is a beautiful experience because the last thing I want to hear on my vacation is someone else’s conversation. Well, that and my rental car is on fire.

But of course, I Iike to remain somewhat busy while in the South Pacific, so I did my fair share of hiking. The Kalalua trail along the rugged Na Pali coast offers a thrill for adventurers seeking the best of what nature has to offer. It is a hidden gem in this tropical paradise. However, I chose to take a different path as my hikes led me to Foodland, ABC Stores and Hilo Hatties in Lihue. And let me tell you, things can get pretty dicey around the calendar aisles when the cruise ship crowds hit the stores. It’s every man for himself, as the terrain can be treacherous when a new batch of “I got lei’d in Hawaii” t-shirts hit the shelves.

Snorkeling on the island is tremendous, and that’s why my brother Brad and his family headed up to Tunnels Beach every morning. Well, that and to catch a glimpse of Charo and Pierce Brosnan. The reefs are full of schools of incredibly colorful, exotic fish and giant sea turtles, who swim around like they own the place.

I did not hit this coral wonderland, as I never liked the way I looked in googles and with paparazzi lurking, that could have been a problem. But I saw it all as Brad was snorkeling with an underwater camera, and each night he showed us the video for us to ohh and ahh about between bites of chocolate coconut macadamia nut pie while we critiqued his camera work. It’s called exploring the wonders of the sea flipper free.

Food might be a little more expensive over in the islands, but it doesn’t bother me. As long as I can wake up in the morning and start my culinary day with a golden papaya, fresh mango or a sweet Maui Gold pineapple, then life and my digestive tract is good. I always like to explore the island’s small fruit stands and sample the various varieties of tropical fruit. We came across a little place on the island called Costco where I purchased five papayas for $5.99. Right then I felt like a was thousands of miles away from civilization and truly in vacation mode.

During the trip I had an exciting agricultural experience, as the house next door to where we stayed had 40 papaya trees with a least six different varieties of this special fruit. I spent the early morning picking papayas and scooping mangos off the top of the trees. I can truly say that it was one of the most enriching experiences since my bar mitzvah, but without the sponge cake and the gifts of savings bonds that put me through hand modeling school.

So here’s the bottom line on a vacation in the Garden Isle. The temperature on the island ranges between 72 and 86 degrees, including Jewish holidays. The beaches are lined with lighty salted macadamia nuts, with the ocean temperature a comfortable 75 to 80 degrees. The smell of napalm and plumeria fill the air, and if you’ve had a whiff of plumeria, you know what heaven smells like. The trade winds blow in and you think to yourself, I’m in paradise. So what if cream cheese is $6 a package?

So it all comes down to this. I believe it was either Buddha or Dr. Phil’s brother who once said, “A vacation is like love. Anticipated with pleasure, experienced with discomfort and remembered with nostalgia. And I still have the sun poisoning to prove it. No vacation goes unpunished.

So for our sunny September wall of photos, I am going to be parked in the islands. We will stroll down the aloha highway as I’ll feature images of sunrises, flowers, fruits and jellyfish stings. However, for today, I’ll start with the homefront, as the first shot is Anahola Bay, and then sunrise on the Anahola River, where we were lodged just steps from. I never tired of sitting in the river as the ocean tide flowed in as the river current flowed out. I believe this process is called ebb and flow or how am I ever going to get all this sand out of my bathing suit?

The next shot is the view from the kitchen window of our beach cottage and the mountain where they filmed King Kong. It was also featured as the opening sequence in “Raiders of the Lost Ark.” We then head west cruising on Highway 560 towards the north shore through Princeville, where I photographed this lovely mountain range, followed by Tunnels Beach, which is alongside a mountain and has the best snorkeling on the island. We end with a shot at sunset of the sun blowing through the clouds proving once that again, as I like to tell my rabbi, “Maika i no Kauai,” which translated means, “So beautiful is Kauai, especially when you can use your miles to pay for air fare.”

If you want to read more about the Anahola experience, go to http://www.sunrisesantacruz.com/blog/2012/08/i-want-to-anahola-your-hand/

On to some late night humor. “John Kerry said it’s “undeniable” that the president of Syria is using weapons of mass destruction. Kerry said President Obama needs to build a coalition of countries and attack soon, no matter what others might say. Today former President George Bush said, “Hey, good luck with that. Let me know how it works out. The state attorney general of New York is suing Donald Trump for $40 million, claiming that Donald Trump University is not a real university. The state claims it’s not a real college because students get very little education and were unable to find jobs after they graduated. Sounds like a real college to me. I guess the attorney general got suspicious it wasn’t a real college when Donald took the senior class on a field trip to try and find President Obama’s birth certificate.” – Jay Leno

“The Kardashian family — looks like now another marriage may be in trouble. They’re saying now that Khloe Kardashian and Lamar Odom are having marital problems. And the state department says its warships are already rushing to the area. So former President George W. Bush had to go into the hospital, had a little heart surgery and he’s OK. “Doctors told him to avoid any heavy exertion, so that means no reading. He had a little touch of coronary artery disease. One of his arteries was clogged with old Al Gore ballots.” –David Letterman

“The mayor of San Diego has been accused of sexually harassing 14 women. Now a Hooters in San Diego has put up a sign saying they won’t serve Mayor Bob Filner because he disrespects women. A spokesperson for Hooters said we don’t want him as a customer, but would love him as a manager.” “Sixty-two percent of New Yorkers say they are embarrassed by the sex scandals of Anthony Weiner. Weiner said, ‘Let me know when that number reaches 69.'” –Conan O’Brien

“Yesterday, Obama met with the prime minister of Greece at the White House. When he heard the leader of Greece was there, Biden said, ‘John Travolta’s here?’ ” –Jimmy Fallon ” The NFL is considering hiring a mother of three to be a referee. They wanted someone who’s used to giving time-outs.There’s a new cable channel of entirely dog-based programing called Dog TV. In a related story, there’s also an entirely cat-based channel called YouTube.” – Conan O’Brien

That’s our first blast for September. I welcomed in the new month by shooting a beautiful sunset on Saturday that came out of nowhere. It was truly spectacular and I’m taking it as a good sign.

We’ll catch you showing the nation what being a real American hero is all about and being awarded the Medal of Honor at the White House. Aloha, mahlao and later, Army Staff Sgt. Ty Michael Carter fans.

Good morning and greetings, back to school fans. After last week’s chronicling of my papaya-filled North Shore adventure, I thought it was time to moveon.org and take a look at some of the summer floral madness that colors the westside of Santa Cruz. But then I came across an article written by Mark Niesse of the Associated Press, and before you could say “Holy chocolate covered macadamia nuts,” I knew what direction this blog was heading. And that would be due west, back to the islands.

Hawaii turned 50 years old last Friday, but there were no parades, no fireworks, no displays of native culture, not even a damn luau. Organizers of the observation were not even willing to call it a party. It is simply a “commemoration,” one that is sensitive to a painful history of the Hawaiian monarchy’s overthrow and unresolved claims of Native Hawaiians. Or in the words of “The Honeymooners” Ed Norton, “That’s the surprise. There ain’t gonna be no party.”

Alaska, by contrast, which joined the union in January, 1959, embraced their 50th anniversary of statehood with concerts, fireworks, a prize-winning float in California’s Rose Parade and a dunk tank featuring Sarah Palin. Were residents excited to see the former Governor/Vice Presidential candidate turned Lens Craft model getting moist in a wet t-shirt? You betcha.

The main event of the island commemoration was a low-key, daylong conference reflecting on Hawaii’s place in the world. But behind the tourist-friendly tropical images of beaches, sunshine and teriyaki beef plate lunches, many natives, lifeguards and Tahitian dancers remain uncomfortable with the U.S. takeover of the islands and the idea that businesses have exploited Hawaiians’ culture.

“Instead of state government having huge parties and fireworks, we’re having a convention,” says Manu Boyd, cultural director for the Royal Hawaiian Center. “That shows the strength and spiritual power of the Hawaiian people, whose shattered world has not yet been addressed.” Or as Mick Jagger says, “Love and hope and sex and dreams, I’m shattered.” My main man Manu is not a happy camper.

Sovereignty groups advocating independence from the United States make up a minority, but many residents recognize the long-standing issues associated with the 1893 overthrow of the monarchy, the islands’ annexation and past harms to the Native Hawaiian people. Hawaii was admitted into the United States on Aug. 21, 1959. About 94 percent of island chain’s voters supported statehood. Opponents argue that the vote was tainted because the only choice on the ballot was to become a state or remain a territory — independence was not an option. I believe I saw this movie, it’s called “Shaft.”

The Hawaiian kingdom was overthrown in 1893 when a group of white businessmen, after a day of snorkeling off Molikini, forced Queen Liliuokalani to abdicate while U.S. Marines came ashore. This never would have happened if Queen Latifah had been manning the thrown. She would have kicked some royal butt.

“This newfangled idea of celebrating statehood shows that people don’t understand Hawaii’s history, or if they do understand, then they’re celebrating a lie, a theft, that essentially stole a people’s right of self-determination,” said Poka Laenui, a Hawaiian and attorney who has worked for independence for more than 30 years. The natives are pissed and I don’t blame them. Or as it stated in my rental car agreement, “Remember the Alamo.”

Along with statehood came striking changes to the islands, as the first commercial jetliner’s arrival in Honolulu just a few weeks earlier began the dawn of the tourism era. Today, Hawaii’s economy depends on tourism as its primary industry, with nearly 7 million visiting the islands in 2008 to snap photos of Pearl Harbor, swim in the warm tropical waters and purchase every possible concoction made from pineapple at the Dole Plantation store.

One way Hawaiians are moving toward having a voice in their self-determination is through legislation pending in Congress that would treat them similarly to Native American tribes and Alaskan natives. After a decade of efforts, the measure could pass into law as soon as this year with the support of Hawaii-born President Barack Obama. Or as the sticker says, “Lucky You Live Hawaii.” Well, we’ll see about that.

On to round two of our North Shore photo funfest. The first image is the lovely view from the deck of our Sunset Beach cottage, followed by a rainbow shot from the front yard. Then it’s on to our neighbor’s papaya tree and some coconuts that fortunately didn’t conk us on the head. We conclude with the sunrise from our first morning followed by the sunset that evening. These were taken the day before my camera went into early retirement and forced me to re-examine my life, liberty and the pursuit of tree-climbing geckos.

On to some late night humor. “I didn’t think this day would come. Squeaky Fromme tried to assassinate President General Ford. She’s been let out of prison. She was paroled. Is she going to get a job? If you think about it, there aren’t many jobs for unstable, gun-toting women, unless she wants to run for governor of Alaska.” How about this? Brett Favre is coming out of retirement and joining the Minnesota Vikings. He’s getting $12 million from Minnesota. Talk about cash for clunkers. Now, here is a statistic — 90% of all paper currency has traces of cocaine. Ninety percent of all paper money in this country, traces of cocaine. Had a $20 bill today. I thought Ben Franklin looked a little jumpy.” –David Letterman

“It’s been reported that former Vice President Cheney is hard at work on his memoirs. It’s called ‘The Five People You Meet in Hell.'” –Conan O’Brien “You remember John Edwards? He finally admitted he’s the father of his mistress’ baby after denying it for over a year. So it’s a pretty classic case of whoever denied it, supplied it. Fortunately, some good news came out of the whole thing, he agreed to join Bristol Palin on the abstinence tour.” –Jimmy Fallon

So that’s our report from the South Pacific. I’d once again like to thank all the firefighters that had a hand in putting out the Lockheed fire that raged last week along the north coast. This past Friday the air was choking with ashes-I hadn’t seen smoke that thick since my last Doobie Brothers concert.

But the skies above Monterey Bay are once again fresh and exciting, as we had some sunset action on Saturday night. So enjoy the summer breeze that makes you feel fine and the final days of August. Loved watching the Yankees beat up on the Red Sox this weekend. We’ll catch you in the deep center. Aloha, mahalo and later, Usain Bolt fans.