August 15, 2010

Who’s Your Friend, I’d Really Like To Meteor

Good morning and greetings, NFL preseason fans. Our gloomy weather has been a popular theme this summer, as while the midwest and east coast continues to swelter through extreme heat and humidity, we’re fogged in and drizzled out. My wife and kids came back from the east coast and were shocked by the chilly weather-I haven’t seen Aimee’s teeth chatter like that since she learned she’ll have to take calculus.

Speaking of the sky, today’s story comes to us from our friends at space.com. The celestial spectacle known as the Perseid meteor shower announced its August arrival with a bright fireball and stirring rendition of “I wish I Was in Dixie” over the skies of sweet home Alabama. Viewers from around the world, along with Oprah and Dr. Phil, were delighted by these bright streaks of light darting across the night sky.

A small 1-inch wide meteor caused the fireball when it met a fiery demise August 3 while streaking through Earth’s atmosphere. The fireball was observed by skywatching cameras at NASA’s Marshall Space Flight Center in Huntsville, Alabama and by roadies and groupies from the Lynyrd Skynyrd band.

The Perseid meteor shower peaked on the night of August 12-13 between midnight and dawn, with no Tony Orlando in sight. The fireball was low and outside in the sky when it entered Earth’s atmosphere. NASA observations found the meteor to be hurtling through the atmosphere at a phenomenal 134,000 mph, or about the same speed I left the DMV office after passing my driving test.

According to a spokesman from NASA, “the meteor cut a path some 65 miles long. It was about six times brighter than the planet Venus and George Bush and would be classified as a fireball by scientists and major league scouts and pitching coaches.”

Because of its relatively low approach in the sky and its long, shallow path, which coincidentally, is what Bush’s high school guidance counselor predicted he’d follow with his life, the meteor qualified as a so-called Earth-grazing meteor. Earth-grazing meteors are space rocks that enter the Earth’s atmosphere at a low angle and appear to move slowly and dramatically along the horizon, like a flock of overweight sea gulls. NASA’s Bill Cooke, who is a fine chef in his own right, says, “earthgrazers skim the atmosphere overhead like a stone skipping across the surface of a pond. Much like the chateaubriand I prepared last night, they are rare, remarkable and very colorful, among the most beautiful of meteors.”

The Perseid meteor shower is an annual event that occurs in mid-August when the Oakland A’s fall out of the pennant race and the Earth passes close to the orbit of the Comet Swift-Tuttle. Comet Swift-Tuttle, whose debris creates the Perseids, is the largest known object, with the exception of Charlie Sheen, to make repeated passes near Earth. Its nucleus is about 6 miles across, roughly equal to the object that wiped out the dinosaurs and disco. Every August, like clockwork or Brett Favre saying he’s going to retire, our planet Earth cuts through the “river of rubble” left behind along the orbit of the comet.

And yet, while comets are composed chiefly of frozen gas, meteors, like my excuses for not using spellcheck, are very flimsy. They are material that, like solar dandruff, that have flaked off comets and are similar in consistency to cigar or Arthur Ashe. Most are scarcely larger than pebbles, grains of sand or the amount of true intelligence we gathered before invading Iraq. They vaporize as they enter Earth’s atmosphere, creating brilliant streaks across the sky, much like the blonde in my hair during my West Cliff days.

Material left behind by the comet, such as rayon and a nice polyester cotton blend, ram into the Earth’s atmosphere at about 37 miles per second. This creates a show of “shooting stars” that has become known as the Perseid meteor shower. These tiny visitors from the cold, vast voids of stellar space, or like newborns in a North Dakota winter, have been orbiting in the solar system for perhaps hundreds or even thousands of years. But they cannot survive the shock of entry and end up streaking across the sky in a brief, blazing finale lasting but a few seconds. Almost none hit the ground, but if one does, it’s an error and called a meteorite.

The Comet Swift-Tuttle and a John McCain high school yearbook were discovered by American astronomers Lewis Swift and Horace Tuttle back in 1862 when Abraham Lincoln was President. It takes the comet about 130 years to orbit the sun. Comet Swift-Tuttle was last seen in 1992, and is due back in 2126, or around the same time I hope to figure out how to use my computer.

The 2010 Perseid meteor shower was one of the best ever, as skywatchers could see about one meteor per minute with maxmum activity of 90 to 100 per hour. And as I’ve always said, when it comes to the Perseid shower, buffalo chicken wings or barbecued baby back ribs, the meteor the better.

As a bonus to our shower and bath coverage, while the planets and moon are all very far apart in space, they appeared in a triangular alignment last week thanks to a special circumstance of orbital mechanics and instant karma. The outer planets, Mars and Saturn, take much longer to go around the sun than the inner planets Venus and Serena. Venus “laps” the outer planets frequently, although Serena has won more titles and has a better serve.

But wait, there’s more. In the predawn of last week, Jupiter was a brilliant jewel high in the southern sky and impossible to miss. That is, unless you are living in Santa Cruz, where it was just a rumor as we had one clear morning in July and none so far in August. In fact, the last time I saw the son at daybreak was when Jason woke me up to ask for power of attorney. And Mercury also made an appearance on the horizon last week, which was a special treat, particularly since it was in the sky and not in my broiled swordfish with toasted almonds.

So on honor of folks here on the central coast seeing less action and color in the sky than you’d spot at a Tea Party pancake breakfast, today we are showcasing a previously unseen winter sunrise from 2010 The date was January 15, a Friday for those of you who are fact checking. Another Disney morning along West Cliff Drive. Not the most fantastic colors I’ve ever seen, but compared to the skies this summer, this is this the Super Bowl, World Series and the final eposide of last season’s “Sons of Anarchy” all wrapped up into one morning.

On to a little bit of the late night. “You know those controversial TSA full-body scanners? Well, they’re coming to airports here in New York next month. Great. Normally I take a Xanax before I fly, now I have to take a Viagra.” –Jimmy Fallon “Yesterday was President Obama’s birthday. He turned 49 years old, if you believe the liberal media.” –Jimmy Kimmel Levi Johnston is running for mayor of Wasilla, Alaska. Ironically, many of the babies he’ll kiss on the campaign trail will be his own.” –Jay Leno

So that’s our weather update. Birthday wishes go out today to my old LA pal Sue Arendt, who hails from the Nutmeg State and is now the Ivanka Trump of real estate up in Berkeley. So feel free to appreciate old friends and your good health. Enjoy the warming trend and we’ll catch you above the net. Aloha, mahalo and later, AVP fans.

August 1, 2010

The Baked Apple

Good morning and greetings, August fans. Well, July 2010 is now history, and it will not go down as the warmest month of my life. Officially, that would have been November of 1952, when I spent the month perfecting my back stroke in the amniotic fluid. Which reminds me of the old joke, “waiter, there’s a fly in my soup. Force of habit, sir. Our chef used to be a tailor.” Or “don’t worry, the spider on your bread will get him.”

Anyway, I was at my daughter’s championship softball game last Wednesday night, and I don’t want to say it was chilly, but my electric blanket was shivering. Now, while we’ve been experiencing frigid summer weather, folks on the east coast have been sweating like Levi Johnston alone with Sarah Palin on a moose hunting trip.

I bring up this meteorological data up because my wife, children and various nannies just left on a ten day trip to New York City. Now, my bride has spent some time back east enjoying the wonders of the heat and humidity, but my son and daughter have never enjoyed that special feeling of extreme discomfort one gets from being in an summer sauna. As the slogan says, I love New York, especially when the humidity is over 100 percent.

Back in the old country, on those days of stifling heat and unbearable humidity, we would just lock down the compound, turn on the air conditioning and wait for Yankee baseball. And of course, there would be runs to the sacred Pizza King for a slice or a chicken parmesan sandwich. As I used to tell our family psychiatrist, “a slice a day keeps the doctor away.”

Which brings us back to New York, New York, the insomniac city that never sleeps. So much to do and see and be afraid of. The Empire State Building, the Statue of Liberty, Wall Street, the Museum of Unnatural History, Yankee Stadium, Hell’s Kitchen, Times Square, Madison Square Garden, Ground Zero, Little Italy, Big Italy and of course, Chinatown, featuring Hop Kee at 21 Mott Street, a true Cantonese experience that’s open till 4am on weekends. Reports are that the lo mein and wor shu gui chicken are still why God created chopsticks.

Throw in the Disunited Nations, Late Night with David Letterman, Rockefeller Front and Center and riding the New York City subways and you’ve had yourself quite a day. I would love to have gone on this trip and visited my ancestor’s sacred burial grounds, but Tommy Wolfe called to remind me that “you can’t go home again,” so I had to pass.

So for those of you who’ve never been to New York or who just love Derek Jeter, here are a few fun facts about the city they say is the greatest in the world. It was once said, if you stand at Times Square long enough, you’ll see the entire world walk or crawl by.

The Dutch purchased the island of Manhattan (really its southern tip) from the Algonquin tribe for trinkets, tools and some duct tape worth about $24. With that they built the Holland Tunnel. More than 60 percent of NYC’s residents do not own a car, a percentage higher than in any other city in the United States. Of the 60 percent who do own cars, 50 percent have had them stolen. The New York subway system is the largest mass transit system in the world with 468 stations and 842 miles of track that runs 24 hours a day. An average of 4.9 million people ride the New York City subway each weekday, with 3.9 million wishing the person next to them would move over a little bit.

New York City has 4,000 street food vendors selling hot dogs, pretzels, falafel, kebobs, and fake Rolexes. The first pizzeria in the United States was opened in NYC in 1895 by Gennaro Lombardi and his brother Pepperoni. Toilet paper was invented by NYC resident Joseph C. Gayetty in 1857, after enjoying a desert of plum pudding. America’s first vending machines were installed in the subways of New York City in 1888, and were broken into for the first time later that same day.

New York’s Yellow Cabs are yellow because John Hertz, the company’s founder, craved daffodils and learned from a study that yellow was the easiest color for the eye to spot. The “New York Post,” established in 1803 by Alexander Hamilton, is the oldest running newspaper in the United States and the place were my thoughts about the NBA could be consistently read by inquiring minds throughout the 1990’s. And finally, New York City is the most populated city in the USA with more than 8.2 million people. 37 percent of the city’s population is foreign-born, which makes this the U.S. city with people utterering obscenities in the most foreign languages at 170.

Moving on to our photo festivities, I like to start out each new month with some color and play-by play. Now, I shoot sunrises and sunsets in August about as often as I admire what the Republicans are doing in Washington, so it came as a bigger surprise than my SAT scores when this sunset hit the skies back on August 5, 2008.

I was shooting this parade of clouds from Stockton Avenue along West Cliff Drive. What added to the drama were the unending chains of pelicans flying thru this glowing festival of light, with some more than sixty strong, adding a Nature Channel bonus to this blessed event. And if that wasn’t enough, a rainbow appeared in the eastern sky, making this the most photographically spectacular August evening since Chelsea Clinton’s bachelorette party.

On to the late night. “Vice President Joe Biden has declared that the heavy lifting is over for the year, and it’s time to begin campaigning and talking about the White House’s accomplishments. The heavy lifting might be over, but it sounds like the heavy shoveling is just beginning.” –Jay Leno “WikiLeaks has posted over 90,000 classified documents about the war in Afghanistan. The Pentagon is outraged, the White House is furious, but British Petroleum is relieved: ‘Finally, a leak we had nothing to do with.'” –Jay Leno “Leaked documents show that Pakistan has been taking American money and using it to fund the Taliban. The Pakistanis are denying it, and they’re like, ‘The Taliban bought those iPods with their own money.'” –Craig Ferguson

“Congress’ approval rating has hit an all-time low of 11 percent. To give you an idea of how bad that is, the BP oil spill is at 12 percent.” –Jay Leno “BP is firing its CEO, Tony Hayward. They’re negotiating a settlement for $18 million. Boy, that’ll teach him.” –David Letterman “BP CEO Tony Hayward complained that he was unfairly ‘demonized’ in the U.S. over his handling of the Gulf oil spill. In response, demons complained that they were unfairly compared to BP CEO Tony Hayward.” –Jimmy Fallon

“Continental announced a new feature called ‘self boarding.’ There’s no ticket agent taking your boarding pass anymore, and you scan it yourself as you board the plane. It’s part of Continental’s ‘Terrorists Fly Hassel-free’ program.” –Jay Leno “A federal judge has blocked Arizona’s immigration law. Immigrants have been celebrating and throwing confetti. The governor of Arizona said, ‘Sure, now they’re showing us their papers.'” –Craig Ferguson Starbucks’ profits went up 37 percent in the third quarter of this year. They say they owe the increase to their new strategy of opening a Starbucks inside an existing Starbucks.” –Jimmy Fallon

So Jeb Bush is running for president. I don’t know about the rest of the country, but thank God, ladies and gentlemen, the comedy recession is over! “A lot of security at the Chelsea Clinton wedding, a huge security detail, and that’s just to keep Bill from the bridesmaids.” -David Letterman “Facebook now has 500 million users. The previous record holder was heroin.” –Jimmy Kimmel

So that’s our first blast for of the new month. Special birthday wishes on August 7 go out to my favorite daughter Aimee, who’s turning sweet 13 and growing more beautiful and entertaining every day. Celebrating on this same day is my old Hermosa Beach pal Bruce Meyers, who when he hears the word “strand,” doesn’t think hair. Also joining the parade this day is my old Syracuse partner in crime, Rhonda Starer, who first turned me on to the the wonders of Hop Kee and chow fun. Then on the 8th, my favorite microbiologist, Dr. Charlotte Borgeson, celebrates her special day with cake, ice cream and a lecture on the wonders of mozzarella cheese.

Reports from the Big Apple say the humidity is on hold, so my family got luckier than Heat fans in Miami. So enjoy the good moments of the day. And if you know someone who’s not doing so well on the health front, say a little prayer for them. We’ll catch you down the left field line. Aloha, mahalo and later, Lance Berkman fans.

July 11, 2010

Birds Fly Over the Oil Spill, Why Then, Oh Why Can’t I?

Good morning and greetings, heat wave fans. While the east coast was suffering under scorching, brutal, record breaking heat and humidity last week, the central coast was cooler than the other side of my pillow. If you like cold and foggy weather in the July, then Santa Cruz was the place to be. What tourist doesn’t love wearing mittens and a down jacket at the beach? Or to paraphrase my old pal Mark Twain, “the coldest winter I ever spent was a summer riding the Big Dipper.”

The temperatures have been sweltering inland, but the chilly, gray sky mornings are normal weather for the coast. According to meteorlogist Diana Henderson of the National Weather Service in Monterey, “it’s not unusual. This happens every year at this time. That’s why they film ‘Baywatch’ in Hawaii.” It’s understandable, because we wouldn’t want to see Pamela Anderson wrapped in a blanket as she tries to save a school of baby dolphins from getting caught in a riptide. That would defeat the porpoise.

The central coast’s frigid summer conditions comes mostly from the chilly Pacific Ocean, which acts as an air conditioner and minty air freshener, according to Henderson. “Without it, we’d be Nevada.” That’s right, blackjack, showgirls and the illusions of Siegfried & Roy, right here, where the redwoods meet the sea and anarchy.

My thanks to Shanna McCord of the Santa Cruz Sentinel for the weather service updates. When I woke up Tuesday morning, the ground was soaked like my tank top after a ten mile run up the coast. It looked like rain, but it was actually the drizzle from the heavy fog. I hadn’t seen that much condensation on the ground since Jennifer Beals took the stage in ‘Flashdance.’

That brings us to our top news story of the week. As reported by Andrew Zajac in the Los Angeles Times, the Agriculture Department’s Natural Resources Conservation Service said it would begin paying some gulf region farmers, ranchers and football coaches to flood their fields so that migratory birds can find alternative rest and nesting grounds to oil-fouled habitats.

The Migratory Bird Habitat Initiative will pay to use up to 150,000 acres of land “to provide feeding, resting and reading areas for migratory birds.” The program applies mainly to former wetlands, low-lying land and skateboard parks in Alabama, Arkansas, Florida, Georgia, Louisiana, Mississippi, Missouri, Texas and France. Conservation officials are hoping to attract birds who don’t have internet access to safe areas before they land on shores and wetlands contaminated by the massive oil spill.

Landowners would be expected to flood fields and promote the growth of vegetation and snacks favored by migratory birds, or to enhance existing wetlands on their properties, as rice fields, fish farms and Long John Silver restaurants are particularly suited to the initiative.

The Deepwater Horizon oil spill has fouled off numerous pitches along with marshes and coastal areas relied on by birds and other wildlife. The gulf region sits beneath one of the world’s major migratory flyways, with about 1 billion birds from more than 300 species passing through annually, says Greg Butcher, a vegetarian and director of bird conservation for the National Audubon Society. “None of this is guaranteed to work,” Butcher says. “We’re expecting that this will work at least a little bit. We’re hoping that it’ll help a lot. What I’m really trying to say is these birds are screwed”

On that positive note, in a story reported by Michael Kunzleman for the Associated Press, less than three years before New Orlean Saints won the Super Bowl and the Gulf oil spill erupted, federal regulators and a couple of fortune tellers concluded several offshore drilling projects posed a low risk to endangered wildlife – a determination that contrasts sharply with recent scenes of birds and vacationers struggling to survive the slick.

A September 2007 memo from the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service said large oil spills from the proposed Gulf drilling projects under review were “low-probability events” that weren’t likely to affect brown pelicans, sea turtles, other animals or the economic futures of fisherman, shrimpers and oyster lovers with Gulf Coast habitats.

The memo concluded that the chance of oil from an offshore spill of at least 1,000 barrels reaching endangered species or their habitats was no greater than 26 percent. Now, I’m no math whiz, but I’d calculate their estimates were off by, approximately, let’s say, a million percent.

Less than three months before the Fish and Wildlife Service issued its memo, the National Marine Fisheries Service concluded that the same Gulf leases, including BP’s for Deepwater Horizon, were “not likely to jeopardize the continued existence of threatened or endangered species.” Well, I’m sure that comes as a relief to all the migrating birds and their families. Because as we all know, a bird in the hand is worth two gallons in the Bush administration.

So in honor of Larry Bird and friends, I thought we would take a look at some winged creatures who reside here on the central coast. We start with a great blue heron, who I photographed right outside the arch early one morning at Its Beach. I shot the snowy egret in the landing mode right after it had flown through the same arch on an extreme low tide afternoon. This was the same day I photographed a rainbow through the arch and decided that I wanted to be Mikhail Baryshnikov when I grow up.

Then it’s onto four snowy egrets in a marshland up in Richardson Bay in Mill Valley, followed by some pink flamingos vacationing in Palm Desert and a snowy egret reflecting in the pond at Natural Bridges. Flamingos don’t actually live here on the central coast but sometimes journey to Monterey Bay for a spa weekend and to have their legs shaved. Much like myself, they enjoy standing on one leg with the other tucked beneath their body. It’s both relaxing and a way to save on the wear and tear of our shoes.

The final image is a red shouldered hawk, who I photographed at Antonelli’s Pond, which is less than a mile by the way the crow flies from my compound here on the westside. It was early in the afternoon when I spotted this beauty. With my zoom, I was able to get close enough to get a shot of those incredible talons wrapped around the branch. And the best part is, this is the only hawk, besides Dominique Wilkins, that I’ve seen in this spot over the past eleven years. There’s something about capturing the flag or the moment.

Here’s a taste of the late night. “The East Coast is suffering from a terrible heat wave. Wall Street bankers are jumping out of windows just for the cool breeze on the way down. You people are so lucky you live in California. This heat wave back east is just unbelievable. … It was so hot in Washington, Nancy Pelosi skipped the Botox, had her face injected with frozen yogurt. Back in 1776, Americans were fighting to escape British rule, these days we’re fighting to escape British oil. They say traces of BP’s oil has started turning up in disturbing places, like congressmen’s pockets.” –Jay Leno

So that’s our show, petroleum lovers. Here’s a few quick petro facts before I cruise off into the fog bank. Americans drivers consume 19-20 million barrels of oil every 24 hours. That’s 10,000 gallons a second. If we all drove 30 miles less per week, oil consumption would drop 20%. Then again, if my aunt had,er, spheres, she’d be my uncle. Just a few things to think about the next time you fill up the old Hummer.

So in honor of the uniting of LeBron James and Dwyane Wade, I’m taking my Sonny Crockett jacket out of mothballs. Sorry Knick fans, but your suffering will continue.

So enjoy the long days of summer and let’s hope someday that we leave Afghanistan. And if you have moment, say a little prayer for the displaced and homeless. We’ll catch you in the American Airlines Arena. Aloha, mahalo and later, David Lee fans.

July 4, 2010

Beauty Is In The July Of The Beholder

Good morning and greetings, fireworks fans. I know many of you are enjoying the holiday but perhaps wondering, how come most of us are not working today? So as part of my patriotic duty and for the fact that I love singing “I’m a Yankee Doodle Dandy,” with the help of Wikipedia, answers.com and my unending stream of semi-conciousness, here’s a quick refresher course on why kids blowing off their fingers and firecrackers on the Fourth of July has become part of the American landscape.

In the United States, Alaska and Hawaii , Independence Day is a federal holiday commemorating the adoption of the Declaration of Independence which declared our independence from the Great Britain, which except for their language, wasn’t really all that great. The Fourth of July is commonly associated with fireworks, parades, barbecues, fist fights, carnivals, fairs, picnics, drunken driving arrests, concerts, baseball games, domestic violence and political speeches that help celebrate one of America’s great three-day weekends.

The trial separation of the American colonies from Great Britain occurred on July 2, 1776, when the Second Continental Congress voted to approve a resolution of independence along with an internship for Monica Lewinsky. Congress then turned its attention to the Declaration of Independence, which had been prepared by a Committee of Five and the Five Stairsteps, with Thomas Jefferson as its principal author. Congress debated and revised the Declaration, finally approving it on July 4. A day earlier, John Adams texted to his wife Abigail:

“The second day of July, 1776, will be the most memorable epoch in the history of America, and not just because most Americans will be home from work. I am apt to believe that it will be celebrated by succeeding generations as the great anniversary festival and blowout mattress sale day. It ought to be commemorated as the day of deliverance, by solemn acts of devotion to God Almighty and Major League Baseball. It ought to be solemnized with pomp and parade from one end of this continent to the other, from this time forward forever more, or at least until we restore our economy, exit Iraq and Afghanistan, and clean up that damn oil spill.”

Adams’ prediction and my birth were off by two days. In a remarkable coincidence, both Adams and Thomas Jefferson, two founding fathers of the United States and the only two men who signed the Declaration of Independence to later become president, died within hours of each other on the same day: July 4, 1826, which was the United States’ 50th anniversary, and the same day of birth as my high school homecoming queen, Vicki Grimsland, the Michelle Pfeiffer of Fort Lee High. Happy birthday, Vicki, and will you please sign my yearbook.

The Declaration of Independence declared. “We hold these truths to be self-evident,
that all men (with the exception of Michael Jordan) are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.” Coincedentally, this is the same oath I had take from Direct TV when I ordered by NBA League Pass.

With these memorable words, Thomas Jefferson, at the age of 33, laid the cornerstone for the United States of America and later his late wife’s half sister, Sally Hemings. The Declaration of Independence invokes the principle of natural rights and lefts. These are the basic rights of which each individual is possessed, and of which he cannot be stripped by society or government except during the George W. Bush administration.

The adoption of the Declaration of Independence and the opening of the first Circuit City took place against the backdrop of ongoing Revolutionary War hostilities. When the signers affixed their John Hancocks and signatures upon the document they were, in the words of the group Triumph, “laying it on the line,” since there was a bounty on the revolutionaries’ heads. Who knew this kind of trouble could come from absorbent paper towels that clean up the smallest spills and biggest messes.

When Benjamin Franklin said, upon signing the Declaration of Independence, “We must all hang together, or assuredly we shall all hang separately,” it was no less than the literal truth. Just ask Saddam Hussein. Fifty-six men and a notary public signed the first copy of the Declaration of Independence. John Hancock, as president of Congress, was first, and he famously wrote his name front, center and large, right before cutting the ribbon on opening of his first insurance company. Remember, for all your financial needs, we have the solution. We’re John Hancock.

Let’s move on to this week’s photo sunspots. Traditionally, July is not a big month for sunrises or the cleanup of the biggest environmental disaster in world history. Looking back into the archives, I have only photographed one July morning sky blowing up over Monterey Bay in the past five years. This is due to coastal fog, lack of clouds and the fact that my contract with National Geographic allows me to sleep in past 5:30 am in the summer.

This central coast beauty graced our skies in July of 2006. It was a warm summer morning, a day that Michelle Obama probably went sleeveless. I woke up from my usual dream of not having studied for my test after not being able to find my car keys while being buck naked. So with that fine start to the day, I grabbed my Miley Cyrus mug, filled it with Red Bull and headed down to the coast.

As you know, when it comes to sunrises, I don’t stray far from Lighthouse Point. But at this time of the year, the sun rises further to the east, so I headed to Cowell’s Beach for the low tide equinox. Surfers were out in full force, as the offshore winds had me swaying as gently as a dancer at a Taliban bachelor party. As you can see, it was a fantastic start to the day, as the clouds, the reflection on the sand and the voices in my head all came together for this convergence of morning light.

On to the late night. “Sunday is July 4, when America combines our two favorite pastimes: alcohol and explosives. The fireworks are beautiful to look at, but more importantly, they drown out the gunfire.” –David Letterman “July 4 is my favorite holiday. No presents, no church, just a lighter and a trunk full of explosives.
Here’s a fireworks safety tip. Don’t get drunk and leave bottle rockets on the grill unless you want to see your hot dogs fly, which is fun too. For the second day, there were no World Cup games. I missed the sound of vuvuzelas so much that I taped a beehive to my head.” –Jimmy Kimmel

“BP’s company newsletter has an article that says most gulf residents aren’t upset with BP because their cleanup crews have boosted the local economy. BP taking credit for boosting the economy in the gulf is like al Qaeda taking credit for creating jobs in airport security.” –Jimmy Kimmel “Here’s something great. Russian spy ring here in New York City. They were busted in New York City. Once again, they were spotted by an alert T-shirt vendor. The Russian spies tried to blend in. They were acting like Americans. As a matter of fact, for two weeks, they were pretending they loved soccer.” –David Letterman

So that’s our first blast for July 2010. Yesterday, I drove by a cemetery, where hundreds of American flags were blowing in the wind. And then it hit me like a ton of emotional bricks, this is what this holiday is all about. For all our faults, God Bless America, home of the brave, land of the free. Or as they say in the NBA, “my country, ’tis of thee, sweet land of free agency.” LeBron James, of thee I sing.

Anyway, take a moment to remember how fortunate you are to be an American. Or a National Leaguer. We’ll catch you in the bullpen. Aloha, mahalo and later, Larry King fans.

June 27, 2010

Soccer Right In The Kisser

Good morning and greetings, sports fans. What a wild and wacky week for supporters on the athletics front. Now, if you know me, you know I’m a soccer nut. Wherever I go, I’m dribbling a soccer ball and yelling GOOOOAAAAALLLLL! I say, what’s not to like about a sport that has little scoring, where the majority players never get use their arms and the fans riot in the stands? USA, USA, USA!

But of course, that’s not the whole story. The USA national team’s journey into this international Woodstock of corner kicks, yellow cards and players faking injuries is teeming with story lines. We’re talking game-deciding goals taken away by outrageously poor officiating, last-minute winning kicks and those nail-biting scoreless tie games. Personally, as a gifted learner, creative thinker and high achiever, I’ve set many goals for myself. Unfortunately, Landon Donovan fans, none have come on the soccer field. Here today, Ghana tomorrow.

Growing up in the Garden State of New Jersey, we did not play ultimate frisbee or launch scud missles with our foreheads to try and score goals. We did play a much less sophisticated form of the sport in kickball, where I performed like Pele in PF Flyers. There must be something genetic in my jeans as neither my son or daughter has much interest in the sport or ever blowing one of those vuvuzela horns. Just a couple of minutes of hearing those made me want to strangle Nelson Mandela and rip out my eardrums. God bless FIFA, as my World Cup runneth over.

Now I understand the excitement surrounding the best players from each country getting together for this kumbaya of international sports competition. The scene in South Africa reminded me of my first trip to Yankee Stadium. I was as excited as Tony Hayward visiting the White House as we crossed over the George Washington Bridge and heading into the Bronx to visit the House the Ruth built.

Earlier in the day, I knew this event was going to be something special as I put on my baseball cap, grabbed by glove and tightened up my bulletproof vest. And when we arrived at these hallowed halls of Yankee greatness and peanut shells, I was not disappointed, although I couldn’t believe all the cursing, violence and alcohol abuse, and that were just among the security guards. “Buy me some macadamia nuts and Cracker Jack, I don’t care if I never go back.”

Then for you tennis fans, we had the match of the ages at Wimbledon, as a five-set thriller between American John Isner and Frenchman John Mahut, (who curiously didn’t surrender,) lasted 11 hours and 5 minutes. That’s right, Brooklyn Decker fans, 11 hours plus. You could have flown to England, picked up some fresh muffins and an autograph from Hugh Grant, gotten back on the plane and arrived home with time to catch the final game and a repeat of “Benny Hill.”

The fifth set itself was a six hour plus marathon, or about the same amount of time it takes me to get dressed for a wedding or an exorcism. Because if you know me, you know I like to dress for success. The score in the fifth set was 70-68, which is like a soccer game ending at 50-49. A match like this, much like weight dropping under 175, will never be seen again.

In the mail this week, I received my new copy of Boys’ Life and Via, the AAA Traveler’s Companion magazine. In the section, “Reader’s Favorite Places to watch sunsets, the first location listed was Lighthouse Point, Santa Cruz, CA. In the words of Tania Garber, “no freeways, buildings, or mountains obscure the view from the cliffs. As the sky and Monterey Bay morph from one beautiful color to another, it’s like watching a movie in its entirety.” Tania, I could not have plagerized it any better.

So for today’s photo listings, we are heading to this glorious spot. These are two sunsets I shot from Tania’s favorite spot. I like shooting here because of the sweeping ocean view, the dynamic color of the cloud reflection action on the sand and the parking is free.

The first three shots are from an early October twilight experience while the last three came in mid-February. For those loyal observers of the sky at dusk, these are good times of the year as summers are a bummer on the color front. We just don’t get the clouds. I haven’t shot a sunrise in months, and that’s why someone like myself, who craves color in the sky and blueberry muffins, doesn’t hibernate in the winter.

On to the late night. “You know about the big change in Afghanistan? General McChrystal did an interview in Rolling Stone and he was talking about how much he didn’t like Joe Biden. He was talking about the Administration. He was trashing everybody. So President Obama calls the guy home from Afghanistan, and they had, like, a sit-down in the White House, in the Oval Office, today. It was very, very intimate. It was the President, it was General McChrystal, the Salahis, and that’s it. The general is in trouble for shooting off his mouth. Once again, another hole Obama can’t plug.” –David Letterman “Today, President Obama fired General Stanley McChrystal, saying McChrystal showed poor judgment in his Rolling Stone interview. It turns out when it comes to criticizing the White House, the general’s policy is ‘just ask, and I’ll tell.'” –Jimmy Fallon

“President Obama is being criticized now. Here’s the problem. The British Petroleum guy, Tony Hayward, was on his yacht recently. Everybody thought, whoa, this idiot. I mean, the Gulf of Mexico is turning to asphalt and the British Petroleum guy is relaxing on his yacht. When he heard about that, President Obama was so angry, he missed a putt. Now, in Obama’s defense, people are saying, ‘Wait a minute, the president has always had his own particular way of relaxing.’ For example, George W. Bush had his way of relaxing. He was president. That’s how he relaxed.” –David Letterman David Letterman’s “Top Ten Ways Tony Hayward Can Improve His Image” 8. Reveal secret behind his soft and lustrous curly hair 6. Shoot new BP commercial where he is viciously pecked by angry pelicans 4. Get a job at Poland Spring; accidentally dump a billion gallons of water into the gulf

“While testifying before Congress yesterday, BP CEO Tony Hayward called the oil spill a ‘complex accident caused by an unprecedented combination of failures.’ Then he realized he was reading notes left on the stand by a Goldman Sachs executive.” –Jimmy Fallon “Congressmen have been saying from the beginning that BP is either lying or grossly incompetent. Well, why can’t we have both?” –David Letterman “Sarah Palin has revealed she has tried marijuana, but she did not like it. You know, it’s amazing: 200 million Americans have smoked marijuana. The only ones who don’t like it seem to be elected officials. Ever notice that?” –Jay Leno

“Looks like this Gore divorce could end up being pretty costly. In fact, Al Gore now talking about only trying to save half the planet.” –Jay Leno “Yesterday, Fed Chairman Ben Bernanke said the economy appears to be on track to continue to expand through this year and next. And then he said, ‘And you can take that to one of the remaining banks.'” –Jimmy Fallon “A great day for President Obama. He addressed a group of senior citizens in Maryland today. He’s pitching his health care bill. According to a poll, half the seniors thought the president was convincing, 30 percent thought he was unconvincing, and the rest thought he was Will Smith.” –Craig Ferguson

So that’s our last posting for June 2010. And congratulations go out to my parents, who last Friday celebrated their 60th wedding anniversary with a lovely lunch at Risorante Italiano, which offers award-winning Italian fare in a casual and festive atmosphere. Not counting leap years, that’s 21,900 days, or 525,600 hours of marital bliss. In a word, unbelievable! And they said it would never last a half century.

Went with Jason and my financial advisor/ minor league scout friend Bruce and his son to the Oakland Coliseum Saturday night to see the A’s in action. It was 70’s Retro Night, and Bruce must have some pictures of owner Lewis Wolff because we had front rows seats behind the A’s dugout. It’s tremendous seeing the ballplayers up close and personal as the head into the dugout, while everyone in the park is sitting behind you. And remember, a walk is as good as a hit and tie goes to the umpire.

So enjoy the remaining days of June and get ready for the July 4th weekend. And if you’re in the mood, tell someone today you love them. We’ll catch you down the right field line. Aloha, mahalo and later, Trevor Cahill fans.

June 20, 2010

One Shoe Over The Cuckoo’s Nest

Good morning and greetings, summer solstice fans. As you know, the Katie Couric in me likes to report on the important news of the day. Whether we’re talking the oil spill, the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan or the secret to those “nooks and crannies” in Thomas’ English Muffins, I don’t want my cyber peeps to miss out on anything important that occurs on my watch.

So you may not have seen this next story, reported by Randolph E. Schmid for the Associated Press, but fear not, my weekly readers, for I have it covered like buttercream frosting on a triple fudge chocolate cake.

Ethel Merman once crooned, “there’s no business like shoe business.” Well, about 5,500 years ago, or around the birth of John McCain, someone in the mountains of Armenia put their best foot forward in what is now the oldest leather shoe ever found. It will never be confused with a clog, a Jimmy Choo or Cinderella’s glass slipper, but this well-preserved Prince Charming of footwear was made of a single piece of leather, laced up the front and back, like a Paris Hilton sweat suit.

Worn and shaped by the wearer’s right foot, the shoe was found in a cave along with an argyle sock and an insert from Dr. Scholl’s. The shoe had been stuffed with grass, a lawn mower and a tiny rake, which all dated back to the same time as the leather of the shoe – between 5,637 and 5,387 years ago.

“This is great luck,” enthused archaeologist and mocassin collector Ron Pinhasi of University College Cork in Cork, Ireland, who led the research team. “We normally only find broken pots, egg timers and microwaves, but we have very little information about the day-to-day activity” of these ancient people. “What did they eat? What did they do? What did they wear? What was Bernie Madoff thinking? This gives us a real glimpse into their society and secretive hedge-funds.”

Previously the oldest leather shoe discovered in Europe or Asia was on the famous Otzi, the “Iceman” found frozen in the Alps a few years ago and now preserved in Italy. Well, either that or a Chuck Taylor hightop Converse sneaker dating back to the early Harlem Globetrotter days. Otzi’s shoes were made of deer and bear leather held together by a leather strap. The Armenian shoe appears to be made of cowhide, which is very similar to a pair of leather chaps I bought at a rodeo in San Francisco.

Older sandals and a pair of Ugg Boots have been found in a cave in the state of Missouri, but those were made of fiber rather than leather. The shoe found in what is now Armenia was found in a pit, along with a broken pot, some wild goat horns and a letter of apology from Tiger Woods.

It’s not clear if the grass that filled the shoe was intended as a lining or insulation, to maintain the shape of the shoe when it was stored or an early cure for preventive glaucoma. The Armenian shoe was small by current standards – European size 37 or U.S. women’s size 7 – but might have fit a man of that era, like a young Wayne Newton or Pee Wee Herman.

While the Armenian shoe was soft like a piece of brie cheese when it was unearthed, the leather has begun to harden like Coach Bobby Knight since it has been exposed to air. And unlike a lot of old shoes, it didn’t smell, which explains the bottle of Dr. Scholl’s Odor Destroyer All Day Deodorant Spray found nearby.

Pinhasi says the shoe is currently at the Institute of Archaeology in Yerevan, but he hopes it will be sent to laboratories in either Switzerland or Germany where it can be treated for preservation with Desenex Antifungal Spray and then returned to Armenia for display in a museum or a Lady Foot Locker. Because as we all know, the shoe must go on.

Moving on to our photo funhouse, in honor of the first day of summer, we’re featuring the first sunrise of the new decade (photos #1-2.) On the morning of January 1, 2010, I journeyed down to West Cliff Drive to meditate and greet the new millenium. It was an overcast morning, but then a hint of light appeared in the east, and as I strummed “this is the dawning of the age of Aquarius” on my autoharp, the sky broke and this delightful color appeared. There is something to be said about being first or a Yankee fan.

We follow this sunrise with a beautiful sunset from eleven days later. These rich images were captured at Natural Bridges as January was a spectacular month for experiencing the pagentry and colors of the coastal sky and for returning holiday gifts. My favorite image is #5, as I zoomed in on this squadron of pelicans heading south at happy hour, who, I found out later, were headed for the early bird special.

On to the late night fun fare. “President Obama is now in the Gulf of Mexico. This is his fourth visit since the spill. So the president has been down there four times. And the head of BP is saying, ‘Well see, it hasn’t affected tourism.’ “Thanks to BP, the Gulf now has two new islands: self-service and full.” –David Letterman “There is good news! BP today finally managed to almost completely stop the flow of information. There is good news. Scientists sent a probe down there in the Gulf of Mexico today and they found traces of seawater.” –Bill Maher

“Here’s a little bit of good news. The Coast Guard says that BP is now catching up to 630,000 gallons of oil a day. The bad news is that they’re capturing it with ducks. The White House said today that BP is moving up its timeline for containing the oil by two weeks. They said they’d get it ‘done, even if they have to work six hours a day, four days a week.’ “There’s some good economic news here. Employers plan to hire 5 percent more college graduates this year than in 2009. Unfortunately, almost all these jobs involve rubber gloves, paper towels, and a one-way ticket to the Gulf of Mexico.” –Jimmy Fallon

“According to a new report, BP has the worst safety record of all the oil companies. They’ve paid over $372 million in fines. Oh, they don’t call them fines. They call them ‘campaign contributions.'” –Jay Leno “The U.S. will face England in the World Cup, and the U.S. ambassador and the U.K. ambassador have made a friendly wager on the game. If England wins, we have to buy their ambassador tea and crumpets, and if we win, they have to buy us a new ocean. “Did you hear about this? In Afghanistan, the U.S. has discovered large deposits of iron, copper, cobalt, gold, and lithium. Or, as most people would call it, ‘not Osama bin Laden.'” –Jimmy Fallon

“Today, President Obama finally met with BP’s CEO, Tony Hayward, but the meeting was only scheduled 20 minutes. Call me crazy, but I think it should take more time to discuss an oil spill than it does to get your oil checked.” –Jimmy Fallon “These British Petroleum guys can’t do anything right. The chairman of BP, Carl-Henric Svanberg, told reporters that sometimes large oil companies are greedy and don’t care, but ‘not BP. We care about the small people.’ That’s what he called the residents of the Gulf — ‘the small people.’ But to be fair, English is not the guy’s first language. Money is. See, the problem is I do believe they care about the small people. Problem is, they don’t care about the big leak.” –Jay Leno

“And then today, the president met with BP CEO Tony Hayward, and Obama was demanding that BP clean up the gulf. And I’m thinking, good luck. They can’t even clean up their gas station restrooms.” –David Letterman David Letterman’s “Top Ten Things Overheard During President Obama’s Meeting with Tony Hayward” 7.”Speaking of leaks, where’s the men’s room?”
6.”Thanks for giving my administration something to worry about besides two wars, a crushing debt, global warming and the worst economy in 70 years” 2.”Biden, please, enough with the vuvuzela”

That’s our first post for the summer of 2010. Congratulations go out to Kobe Bryant and the Los Angeles Lakers for knocking off the Boston Celtics in a hard-fought, seven game series to capture their second consecutive NBA title. It’s always sad when the short, eight month NBA season comes to end, but it will give me a chance to work on my poetry, song writing and body sculpting.

So enjoy the official start of summer, the longest Monday of the year and we’ll catch you at the NBA draft. Aloha, mahalo and later, Phil Jackson fans.

April 25, 2010

Hey, We’re Packed In Like Sardines

Good morning and greetings, nuclear disarmament fans. Well, spring is in full bloom, and for allergy sufferers, April flowers bring congestion, sneezing, runny noses and the urge to rip out the back of your throat. Fortunately for me, all I’m allergic to is penicillin and Fox News, so I’m on a sinus roll.

So while a good segment of the population is experiencing that postnasal drip, headachey, watery eye type of feeling, my wandering eye was elsewhere. For today’s story, we head to the far northeastern corner of our nation, a place where the sun rises first. It was filed by CLARKE CANFIELD of the Associated Press. And as you know, four of out five dentists recommend the Associated Press for their patients who are looking for material to entertain their blog readers with.

For the past 135 years, sardine canneries have been as much a part of Maine’s small coastal villages as clam chowder served in a sourdough bread bowl on the Santa Cruz wharf. It’s been estimated that more than 400 canneries have come and gone as the lone survivor, the Stinson Seafood plant, shut down last week after a century in operation. It is the last sardine cannery not just in Maine, but in the United States. In the words of Don McLean, “bye, bye, Miss American Sardine Pie.”

Like english muffins, french toast and Penelope Cruz, sardines were once considered an imported delicacy. They are any of dozens of small, oily, cold-water fish that are part of the herring family that are sold in tightly packed cans. They are very familiar to me as I once had a ballroom dance instructor who was a very cold fish.

The first U.S. sardine cannery opened in Maine in 1875. Dozens of plants soon popped up, sounding whistles, loud horns, and a medly of Bee Gees’ greatest hits to alert local workers when a boat came in with its catch. By 1900 there were 75 canneries, where knife-wielding men, women, robbers and young children expertly sliced off heads and tails and removed innards before packing them tight into sardine tins, like riders on a New York subway train at rush hour.

Production at Maine canneries has been sliding since peaking at 384 million cans in 1950. Last year, Stinson produced 30 million cans. As Robert Plant used to ask in the middle of Stairway to Heaven, “does anyone remember sardines?”

Still, it came as a surprise to employees when Bumble Bee Foods LLC announced in February that the plant would close. The plant was under pressure from shrinking consumer demand, increased foreign competition and the that fact that diners could never get that intense fishy smell off their fingers.

Sardines at one time were an inexpensive staple for many Americans who packed them into their lunchboxes and shirt pockets. Ronnie Peabody, who runs the Maine Coast Sardine History Museum and a Popeye’s Chicken in the town of Jonesport, has a cookbook published in 1950 called “58 Ways to Serve Sardines.” It includes recipes for sardine soup, casserole, parmesan, creamed sardines and spinach and my personal favorite, spaghetti and sardine balls.

Sardine consumption began falling decades ago, he said, after canned tuna came on the market and Americans’ tastes changed. In Monterey, California, a group of self-described “sardinistas,” who deny ever trying to overthrow the government of Nicaragua, have taken on the task of trying to get Americans to eat more sardines. The group is formulating a business plan in hopes of returning “the lowly sardine to the American palate and bring and NFL team to Los Angeles,” said Mike Sutton, a vice president at the Monterey Bay Aquarium.

But not canned sardines. That’s over, Johnny. Sutton’s group wants to promote fresh sardines sold at fine dining establishments like Wienerschnitzel or in prepared foods at retail stores, much the way tuna, salmon and Pepperidge Farm goldfish are now sold.

“We recognize the American public turns their noses up at sardines,” Sutton said. “It may be a challenge and it may be insurmountable, but our motto is ‘It’s not your grandfather’s sardine.'”

Well, my grandfather, who loved the New York Yankees and break dancing, never showed any fondness for sardines. I’ve never had a bite of sardines in my life. But I remember when I was a youngster, we’d grab our fishing poles and head down to the river to catch catfish, crayfish and my grandpa’s favorite, gefilte fish. We’d come home, fry them up and then just text each other all night. Ah, life along the Mississippi.

But wait, there’s more. People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals have written a letter to Maine Governor John Baldacci encouraging him to press for something other than seafood processing at the site of the recently closed Stinson plant. PETA official Tracy Reiman says “lobsters and fish are smart, sensitive and unique individuals who should be respected, not killed and canned.” Reiman suggests using the plant to package blueberries instead of seafood. I think she may have a point. Fish are considered brain food, they swim in schools, and when was the last time you heard someone say, “look, you stupid trout.”

So let’s move on to today’s photo fantasy tour. For you Alex Trebek fans, this is what is known as the daily double, the sunrise and sunset from the same day. We’re heading back to early January, when this amazing color filled the morning sky down at Lighthouse Point. Later that day, after watching a little Jeopardy, I came back down to the cliff as returning champion to finish my task, and you can see the the results. The final shot was taken after the sun had set and featured some really unusual colors-I hadn’t see those kind of hues since I wandered into the Rainbow Family’s meditation circle at Woodstock.

Let’s bring on the late night fun. “As you probably know, the volcano on the tiny island of Iceland has shut down air traffic. President Obama had to cancel his trip to Poland. President Obama said he hopes the volcano will stop smoking soon and the volcano said the same thing about him.” –Jimmy Kimmel “The volcanic ash from Iceland disrupted air travel all over Europe. Everything’s grounded. Commercial flights. Private jets. The only thing still flying — Toyotas. “President Obama and some prominent Democrats proposed a solution to the erupting volcano — they want to pour money into it. “According to a top Iranian cleric, earthquakes and volcanoes are caused by women wearing immodest clothing. Or as most guys would call it: a fair trade-off.” –Jay Leno

“The British government sent a warship to France to bring home stranded Britons. There was an embarrassing moment — when the ship pulled up to the port, the French immediately surrendered.” –Jay Leno “The volcano cloud is gritty ash and it’s making its way toward Russia. In fact, Sarah Palin can see it from her house.” –David Letterman “Sarah Palin got an iPad and she was complaining that it’s not really that absorbent.” –Bill Maher “Everyone knows if a Republican comes out of the closet and sees a gay shadow, it means six more years of a Democratic administration.” –Jon Stewart

“Well, the government said today Somali pirates being held in U.S. custody will be brought to the United States for prosecution, and they will be tried by a jury of their peers. So I’m guessing that’s what, Goldman Sachs? Well, just four days after Goldman Sachs cost investors $12 billion by failing to tell them that they’re being investigated for fraud, they gave out another $5.4 billion in bonuses. Huh? Even Somali pirates are going, ‘Come on! This is rather disturbing. A government panel made up of all retired military personnel says that the school lunches are a threat to our national security because they make our kids too fat to serve the country. It’s unbelievable. Remember the old days, when the Army wanted the best and the brightest? Now they’re stuck with the biggest and the widest.” –Jay Leno

So that’s our final blast for April. The NBA playoffs are going full tilt and the action was hot and heavy last week. Laker fans are sweating like Bernie Madoff waiting in the shower line. So enjoy the warm days, sunny skies and we’ll catch you at the scorer’s table. Aloha, mahalo and later, Kevin Durant fans.

April 4, 2010

No Woman Is An Island

Good morning and greetings, championship game fans. As many of you know, I’m rather fond of orchids and running in ultra marathon races. My brother Paul recently gave me an oncidium named Sherry Baby that I placed in my office, and when the spray of flowers opened, it smelled like vanilla heaven. The intoxicating scent gently wafted thru the air, emitting the same delicious smelling sensation one gets from the rain forests of Maui. Just a very intense olfactory experience, much like my freshman year at Syracuse.

I’ve fallen in love with a magazine called “The Week,” which is the best of U.S. and international media. I’m so impressed that I got my son a subscription that will run thru his final year of rabbinical school. Whether it’s the recent skirmish between the U.S. and Israel, the political turmoil in Turkey or a great recipe for walnut raisin stuffing, this publication covers it all. It’s like a combination of Time, Newsweek, National Review and Mad Magazine. I haven’t been this up to date on the world scene since Walter Cronkite called me for my recipe for matzo brei.

So on that note, I recently ran across an item that I thought was blog worthy. It was written by Associated Press writer Nirmala George (no relation to Curious) with a no-look assist from yours truly.

For nearly 30 years, India and Bangladesh have argued over control of a tiny rock island in the Bay of Bengal. Now, rising sea levels have resolved the dispute for them, as much like my dreams of becoming a puppet, a poet or Somali pirate, the island’s gone.

New Moore Island in the Sunderbans has been completely submerged, said oceanographer Sugata Hazra, a professor and wresting coach at Jadavpur University in Calcutta. Its disappearance has been confirmed by satellite imagery, sea patrols, and judges from the Miss Hawaiian Tropic contest. “What these two countries could not achieve from years of talking, emailing and chat rooms, has been resolved by global warming,” said Hazra.

Scientists in India have noted an alarming increase in the rate at which sea levels, the cost of shrimp cocktail and glass bottom boat rides have risen over the past decade in the Bay of Bengal. A nearby island, Lohachara, was submerged in 1996, forcing its inhabitants to swim the backstroke in a freestyle relay to the mainland. At least 10 other islands in the area, are also experiencing that sinking feeling, Hazra said.

Bangladesh is one of the countries most-affected by global warming. It is a low lying nation, unlike Rush Limbaugh, who is a low lying fool. Officials estimate 18 percent of Bangladesh’s coastal area will be underwater and 20 million people will be displaced by 2050 if sea levels rise continue to rise. The rich get richer, the poor get drenched.

India and Bangladesh both claimed the empty New Moore Island, which is about 2 miles long, 1.5 miles wide and as deep as an episode of CBS’s “The Big Bang Theory.” Bangladesh referred to the island as South Talpatti or Someone Tell Patty This Rock Is Sinking. There were no permanent structures on New Moore, but India sent some paramilitary soldiers to its rocky shores in 1981 to hoist its national flag and open up call center for Delta Airlines.

Bangladesh officials were not immediately available for comment but a spokesman later summed up the situation with these words from Simon and Garfunkle, “I am a rock, I was an island.”

So having been voted off the island and in honor of our first look of April, I thought I would blast out with some skylights of color. I know you’re probably thinking, “Wow, how unusual that Geoff would want to feature some color on this site.” Well, every once in a while I like to venture out of my comfort zone. Or as Robert Palmer once told me, “Might as well face it, you’re addicted to color.”

The first two shots are from December and a previously unseen sunrise. We then move to the cliffs north of Natural Bridges for the next photo duet. I was a little late on this night and just caught the final act of this sunset sonata, but fortunately, much like having chocolate fudge cake for dessert, it ended on a sweet note.

In our final photo segment, we move back to the sunrise mode. This is from a morning in January that blew the doors of the lovers and strangers along West Cliff Drive. I had previously featured a couple of jolts from this morning, but the sky was so amazing that it warranted more coverage. Moments of intense color like this are why I wake up the roosters.

On to the late night. “President Obama made a surprise visit to Afghanistan this past weekend. I guess after the last 14 months in Washington, he wanted to go someplace where there was less fighting.” –Jay Leno “President Obama met with Afghanistan President Hamid Karzai. This was an important meeting. Both presidents agreed that we have to work to wipe out terror networks, like Al Qaeda, the Taliban, Fox News.” –David Letterman “Defense Secretary Robert Gates has ordered the armed forces to initiate changes to their policy of discharging homosexuals. They’ve changed from the ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ policy, to the ‘If you think he’s gay, look away’ policy.” –Jimmy Kimmel

“Well, according to ‘Newsweek,’ the FBI now says Osama bin Laden is healthy and giving the orders once again for al Qaeda. Today, Republicans blamed it on the new healthcare bill.” –Jay Leno “And unemployment in Florida hit a record high of 12.2 percent. You want to know how bad it is down there? Today, the Coast Guard picked up 50 Cubans off the coast of Miami trying to swim back to Cuba.” –Jay Leno “Pamela Anderson on ‘Dancing with the Stars’. You know who else is on ‘Dancing with the Stars’? Former astronaut Buzz Aldrin. Pam Anderson and Buzz Aldrin. Honest to God, it looks like a Republican ticket.” –David Letterman

“Well, here’s some good news for us. Iran’s top nuclear scientist has defected to the CIA and is now here in the United States. He’s now on our side. And he had some frightening information. He said Iran was just weeks away from developing their very own Toyota Prius.” –Jay Leno “Thursday is Census deadline day. The census would like every resident of the United States to fill out their form and mail it in. If you don’t know how many people live in your house, just count the number of iPods.” –Jimmy Kimmel “Here’s a fascinating story. The Republican National Committee got together and said, ‘Let’s have a party.’ We’ll get the Republican National Committee to pay for it — money that we get from donations and contributions. And they said, ‘Well, let’s go to Los Angeles to a sex club.’ So they end up there at a bondage club in Los Angeles. And I thought that makes perfect sense because Republicans love tying things up: health care, climate control; financial reform.” –David Letterman

So that’s our Opening Day preview. Enjoy tonight’s NCAA title game, as two teams will play for the right to proclaim, in the words of the late Freddie Mercury and Queen, “We are the champions, my friend.” Next week we’ll head out to the southland and check out some desert sky action. So enjoy the final drops of March Madness and the opening of our national pastime. We’ll catch you’re running the box and one. Aloha, mahalo and later, Mike Krzyzewski fans.

Good morning and greetings, championship game fans. As many of you know, I’m rather fond of orchids and running in ultra marathon races. My brother Paul recently gave me an oncidium named Sherry Baby that I placed in my office, and when the spray of flowers opened, it smelled like vanilla heaven. The intoxicating scent gently wafted thru the air, emitting the same delicious smelling sensation one gets from the rain forests on Maui. Just a very intense olfactory experience, much like my freshman year at Syracuse.

I’ve fallen in love with a magazine called “The Week,” which is the best of U.S. and international media. I’m so impressed that I got my son a subscription that will run thru his final year of rabbinical school. Whether it’s the recent skirmish between the U.S. and Israel, the political turmoil in Turkey or a great recipe for walnut raisin stuffing, this publication covers it all. It’s like a combination of Time, Newsweek, National Review and Mad Magazine. I haven’t been this up to date on the world scene since Walter Cronkite called me for my recipe for matzo brei.

So on that note, I recently ran across an item that I thought was blog worthy. It was written by Associated Press writer Nirmala George (no relation to Curious) with a no-look assist from yours truly.

For nearly 30 years, India and Bangladesh have argued over control of a tiny rock island in the Bay of Bengal. Now, rising sea levels have resolved the dispute for them, as much like my dreams of becoming a puppet, a poet or Somali pirate, the island’s gone.

New Moore Island in the Sunderbans has been completely submerged, said oceanographer Sugata Hazra, a professor and wresting coach at Jadavpur University in Calcutta. Its disappearance has been confirmed by satellite imagery, sea patrols, and judges from the Miss Hawaiian Tropic contest. “What these two countries could not achieve from years of talking, emailing and chat rooms, has been resolved by global warming,” said Hazra.

Scientists in India have noted an alarming increase in the rate at which sea levels, the cost of shrimp cocktail and glass bottom boat rides have risen over the past decade in the Bay of Bengal. A nearby island, Lohachara, was submerged in 1996, forcing its inhabitants to swim the backstroke in a freestyle relay to the mainland. At least 10 other islands in the area, are also experiencing that sinking feeling, Hazra said.

Bangladesh is one of the countries most-affected by global warming. It is a low lying nation, unlike Rush Limbaugh, who is a low lying fool. Officials estimate 18 percent of Bangladesh’s coastal area will be underwater and 20 million people will be displaced by 2050 if sea levels rise continue to rise. The rich get richer, the poor get drenched.

India and Bangladesh both claimed the empty New Moore Island, which is about 2 miles long, 1.5 miles wide and as deep as an episode of CBS’s “The Big Bang Theory.” Bangladesh referred to the island as South Talpatti or Someone Tell Patty This Rock Is Sinking. There were no permanent structures on New Moore, but India sent some paramilitary soldiers to its rocky shores in 1981 to hoist its national flag and open up call center for Delta Airlines.

Bangladesh officials were not immediately available for comment but a spokesman later summed up the situation with these words from Simon and Garfunkle, “I am a rock, I was an island.”

So having been voted off the island and in honor of our first look of April, I thought I would blast out with some skylights of color. I know you’re probably thinking, “Wow, how unusual that Geoff would want to feature some color on this site.” Well, every once in a while I like to venture out of my comfort zone. Or as Robert Palmer once told me, “Might as well face it, you’re addicted to color.”

The first two shots are from December and a previously unseen sunrise. We then move to the cliffs north of Natural Bridges for the next photo duet. I was a little late on this night and just caught the final act of this sunset sonata, but fortunately, much like having chocolate fudge cake for dessert, it ended on a sweet note.

In our final photo segment, we move back to the sunrise mode. This is from a morning in January that blew the doors of the lovers and strangers along West Cliff Drive. I had previously featured a couple of jolts from this morning, but the sky was so amazing that it warranted more coverage. Moments of intense color like this are why I wake up the roosters.

On to the late night. “President Obama made a surprise visit to Afghanistan this past weekend. I guess after the last 14 months in Washington, he wanted to go someplace where there was less fighting.” –Jay Leno “President Obama met with Afghanistan President Hamid Karzai. This was an important meeting. Both presidents agreed that we have to work to wipe out terror networks, like Al Qaeda, the Taliban, Fox News.” –David Letterman “Defense Secretary Robert Gates has ordered the armed forces to initiate changes to their policy of discharging homosexuals. They’ve changed from the ‘Don’t ask, don’t tell’ policy, to the ‘If you think he’s gay, look away’ policy.” –Jimmy Kimmel

“Well, according to ‘Newsweek,’ the FBI now says Osama bin Laden is healthy and giving the orders once again for al Qaeda. Today, Republicans blamed it on the new healthcare bill.” –Jay Leno “And unemployment in Florida hit a record high of 12.2 percent. You want to know how bad it is down there? Today, the Coast Guard picked up 50 Cubans off the coast of Miami trying to swim back to Cuba.” –Jay Leno “Pamela Anderson on ‘Dancing with the Stars’. You know who else is on ‘Dancing with the Stars’? Former astronaut Buzz Aldrin. Pam Anderson and Buzz Aldrin. Honest to God, it looks like a Republican ticket.” –David Letterman

“Well, here’s some good news for us. Iran’s top nuclear scientist has defected to the CIA and is now here in the United States. He’s now on our side. And he had some frightening information. He said Iran was just weeks away from developing their very own Toyota Prius.” –Jay Leno “Thursday is Census deadline day. The census would like every resident of the United States to fill out their form and mail it in. If you don’t know how many people live in your house, just count the number of iPods.” –Jimmy Kimmel “Here’s a fascinating story. The Republican National Committee got together and said, ‘Let’s have a party.’ We’ll get the Republican National Committee to pay for it — money that we get from donations and contributions. And they said, ‘Well, let’s go to Los Angeles to a sex club.’ So they end up there at a bondage club in Los Angeles. And I thought that makes perfect sense because Republicans love tying things up: health care, climate control; financial reform.” –David Letterman

So that’s our Opening Day preview. Enjoy tonight’s NCAA title game, as two teams will play for the right to proclaim, in the words of the late Freddie Mercury and Queen, “We are the champions, my friend.” Next week we’ll head out to the southland and check out some desert sky action. So enjoy the final drops of March Madness and the opening of our national pastime. We’ll catch you’re running the box and one. Aloha, mahalo and later, Mike Krzyzewski fans.

February 7, 2010

It’s Texture, Not Conjecture

Good morning and greetings, Super Bowl fans. That’s right, Super Sunday has come and gone, much like American families’ dreams of realistic health care costs. And congratulations to Drew Brees and the New Orleans Saints. They pulled off a impressive comeback in beating the Peyton Manning and the Colts, 31-17. Games like this make me harken back to those incredible Super Bowl moments, like when the ring around Janet Jackson was revealed during that infamous “wardrobe malfunction.”

But let’s get down to those vital game statistics. No, I’m not referring to total passing yards, time of possession or who had the most talked about tv commercial, I’m referring to what makes this day a sacred holiday-Super Bowl snacking.

Now we know that Super Sunday is the number three day in terms of food consumption after Thanksgiving and Yom Kippur. $55 million was spent on snacks for this Woodstock of caloric consumption, along with ten million man (and women) hours of Super Bowl food preparation. And according to the Institute of Insane Food Intake, the IIFI, Americans devoured 15,000 tons of chips, 4,000 tons of popcorn and 200,000,000 hours of tv commercials. So if we lined up every chip, it would produce a trail of 293,000 miles, or what for me is a good week’s cardiac workout. A string consisting of all that popcorn would circle the earth almost 5 1/2 times, which would be equivilent to the same amount of time it will take the Republicans to pass anything proposed by the Obama administration.

But the winner of the big enchilada on Super food day in terms of sales is our friend the avocado. The California Avocado Commission, (or the CAC, not to confused with the ACC,) which is more believable than the Warren Commission, says that 12 million pounds of avocado were sold in preparation for the game. What this means is this nation’s party-loving, football-watching, gambling fanatics gorged themselves on an estimated 8 million pounds of gaucamole. Holy chips and salsa, Batman. And last but not least, according to Hallmark Cards Inc., the Super Bowl represents the number one at home party event of the year, bigger than New Year’s Eve, a Mary Kay event or the other Olsen twin.

For today’s starting photo lineup, we journey to the most Natural of Bridges State Beach, where I had gone to shoot the sunset. It had rained all day and the sun decided to make a late afternoon appearance. The action on the horizon was nothing special, but the color radiating from the cliffs was off the charts. We’re talking gleaming, golden chocolate, a color of which I’ve only seen once before at this location, and that was during an out of body experience. In the words of Stevie Wonder, “Golden lady, golden lady, I’d like to go there. Take me right away.” I was there.

We then move on to the sand, and while the iceplant-lined cliffs were bursting with color, the billions of granules of tiny rocks were experiencing the same visual gold rush, as the beach was lit up like Rockefeller Center at Christmas time. We then move on to another interesting sand pattern that caught my eye, much like the first time I glanced at an NBA stat sheet.

We then travel cross-town over to the eastside, where I shot the sunset from the cliff above the Rivermouth. This is where the San Lorenzo River meets the Pacific Ocean. I sent this shot to a dedicated blog reader from southern California whose comment was “it is hard to believe that is water. It almost looks like sand with plastic wrap on top.” And it also clings tight, is microwave-soft and helps keep food fresh.

We end our texture experience with my favorite shot from this genre. This photo was taken on January 23, 2008, on the night of one of the most fabulous sunsets I’ve ever experienced in men’s clothes. The image is the sunlight shining on the streams of water on the sand at Natural Bridges. I call this shot “Another Planet,” the place I wish I had been rather than watching the New York Giants play the second half of this past season.

Let’s move on to the late night experience. “The president won’t be at the Super Bowl either. In fact, in a show of some sort of spirit of cooperation, he’s invited a group of top Republicans to watch the game with him at the White House on Sunday. That should be a lot of fun. Going to need a two-thirds vote before they pass him the Doritos.” –Jimmy Kimmel “President Obama is very shrewd about bringing the Republicans into the White House for the Super Bowl party, because he feels like if he can get them to pass the dip, maybe they’ll pass health care.” –David Letterman At the town hall event, President Obama also said jobs will be our No. 1 focus in 2010. He then added, ‘Specifically, mine and Biden’s jobs.'” –Jimmy Fallon

“You folks excited about the Super Bowl coming up Sunday? And the New Orleans Saints’ fans, I’m telling you, they have waited a long, long time for their team to get into the Super Bowl. Not as long as they waited for FEMA, but still, it’s been a very long, long time. “I think it was Bill Clinton who popularized the ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell’ policy. But don’t confuse that with another Clinton policy — ‘Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell Hillary.’ That was a whole different policy.” –David Letterman This is unfortunate. I heard that John Edwards and his wife Elizabeth have legally separated. Under the reasons for separation, Elizabeth Edwards just wrote ‘see news.'” –Jimmy Fallon

“They’re now coming out with the new, 75th edition of Monopoly, this time with a round board. And actually, they’ve updated the whole game. In the new version, the banker is a Wall Street CEO He overextends mortgages, he loses the bank, and when things go under, he uses his get-out-of-jail-for-free card. So it’s all very realistic. Here is a historical fact. It was on this day in 1690, the first paper money was printed up in the colony of Massachusetts. The pilgrims realized that when they ran out of money, they could just print more. Thus, the federal government was born. Toyota is recalling 2.3 million cars because of two problems — unintended acceleration and possible brake problems. Things are not looking good for Toyota. In fact, today, two crash test dummies refused to get in the car.” – Jay Leno

That’s our Super Bowl report. Now that NFL season is officially over, I can focus my attention on what’s really important in life, NBA baskeball. If you had a chance to pick up Saturday’s Santa Cruz Sentinel, you might have seen a shot of my son on the front page, playing the role of point guard for the PCS Pumas. His team is undefeated in league play and heading for it’s first league title. And all this without cheerleaders at the nation’s number one academically-rated charter school. So enjoy the record snow in Washington, D.C., the NBA all-star game and be ready for the onside kick. Aloha, mahalo and later, Sean Payton fans.

January 31, 2010

Beauty And The East

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Good morning and greetings, State of the Union fans. Let's start off today's festivities with a quick no-look pass at the national scene. President Obama just celebrated his first year anniversary in the White House with cake and ice feelings. A year ago, he took the oath of office, promising to be, according to Dick Polman of the Philadelphia Inquirer "a transformational president who would cure our ills and cleanse our politics." Today, only 39% of people said they would vote for him again and over 70% put the blame for his failures on his being lefthanded.
As Obama himself has conceded, the country "has the right to be deflated," writes Sean Wilenz in the New York Daily News. My jump shot is in better shape than the President's health-care reform, the economy is unemployed, and Iraq and Afghanistann are a bigger mess than my garage. A year ago, Americans were talking about electing "another Lincoln." Adds Wilenz, today Obama looks "less like a political messiah and more like a victim of unrealistic expectations." Which sound hauntily familiar to my first year of coaching basketball at the Boys & Girls club.

On the other hand, the economy, unlike my archilles tendon eight years ago, didn't collapse (actually , I was kicked,) and unlike when I started losing my basketball quickness, the country didn't suffer through a depression. For those Americans who were looking for instant results or instant karma, there's been a lot of frustration, much like the feeling of missing a wide-open layup.

Overall, it's been a trying year for our Commander-in-Chief, who walked into a situation that was trickier than the questions in the math section of my SAT's. The question is, are we better off now than we were a year ago? Remember, Jim Rome wasn't built in a day, but for many Americans, these are very stressful times, particularly if you're a Golden State Warrior fan.

Moving right along, in the Declaration of Independence, which ranks right up there with the Gettysburg Address and John Belushi's "Animal House" rantings, "Over? Did you say 'over?' Nothing is over until we decide it is! Was it over when the German's bombed Pearl Harbor? Hell, no!," provides us with "life, liberty and the pursuit to view sunrises. Which leads me into today's point of interest. I ran across an article written by Abby Goodnough in the New York Times from January 5th. In it she wrote, in a new setback for a controversial wind farm proposed off of Cape Cod, which is not to be confused with a wind bag like Rush Limbaugh, the National Park Service announced that Nantucket Sound was eligible for listing on the National Register of Historic Places, guaranteeing further delays for the project.

Known as Cape Wind, the project is the nation’s first planned offshore wind farm and would cover 24 square miles in the sound, an area roughly the size of Manhattan, which we got from the Indians for $24 and a signed Derek Jeter baseball card. The park service decision came in response to a request from two Massachusetts Indian tribes, who said the 130 proposed wind turbines would thwart their spiritual ritual of greeting the sunrise, which requires unobstructed views across the sound, disturb ancestral burial grounds and change the television reception they receive for Red Sox home games.

In seeking the historical designation, the Wampanoag tribes — whose name translates to “people of the first light” — said their view to the east across Nantucket Sound was integral to their identity and cultural traditions. “Here is where we still arrive to greet the new day, watch for celestial observations in the night sky, follow the migration of the sun and stars in change with the season and watch Celtic games,” wrote Bettina Washington, historic preservation officer for the Aquinnah Wampanoag, in a letter to federal officials.

So this is where I pick up the story. What these two Indian tribes are asking for is the right to view an unobstructed sunrise, something they have done for a bit longer than I've been posting Sunrise Santa Cruz. They, more than anyone else, know that there is something spirtually cleansing to viewing the magnificence and beauty that daybreak brings to the dawning table. And I can relate to the "people of the first light," as at this stage of my life, I need some kind of light to read anything. The eyes may be the window to the soul, but I need those cheater glasses to see it. In conclusion, if it's important to Abby Goodnough, well, then that's good enough for me.

So for our photo journey, I have selected a montage of two shots of three different sunrises from the first eleven days of the new year. I could have gone with one more photo, but that would have been 7 from the first Eleven and that's just too much slurping for me.

Anyway, the first series is from January 2, just a wild display of some orange-tangerine wonder in the eastern sky above Lighthouse Point. We then move to the following day, where I was able to add my favorite arch to our photo ensemble. But my favorite sunrise of the year came eight days later on January 11, when I was shooting from Fair Avenue along West Cliff Drive and the sky just blew up with color. I shot from this spot to get a good overall view of the skies above Monterey Bay and it was just plastic fantastic. The windows of the houses along the cliff were glowing like my mind when people tell me that they were thinking about me while experiencing a beautiful sunrise. Reggie Jackson was known as "Mr. October." I'm thinking of myself as Mr. November, December and January.

Because of reruns, late night was a little light this week but here we go. "John McCain's wife and her daughter, Meghan, have posed for pictures endorsing gay marriage here in California, although Senator McCain — well, he's still very traditional. He believes marriage should be between an older man and a really hot-looking younger woman.
"Congratulations to the Indianapolis Colts and the New Orleans Saints. They're going to the Super Bowl. The Saints beat the Vikings. Former President George Bush Sr., he was at the game. Now, his son George W. was invited. But you know him, when it comes to New Orleans, he's always, like, two weeks late." – Jay Leno

Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger announced that California can save money by no longer incarcerating illegal immigrants and just sending them to Mexico instead. Well, actually, today, the immigrants had three words for Schwarzenegger – 'I'll be back.'" "Wal-Mart announced it's cutting over 11,000 jobs. "That's an amazing amount of people: The problem is they made the announcement in English, so everybody kept showing up for work." –Jay Leno "It's Russian comedian Yakov Smirnoff's birthday today and he celebrated, spent the entire day waving to Sarah Palin." –David Letterman

So that's our first blast from the month of February. Last week I mentioned rumors of a guest blog, but much like Brett Favre going to Miami, it just didn't happen. But it shall and there are also major snow drifts on the horizon. And don't worry, I've got lots more sunrises waiting on the cyber runway. And just to keep the presidential record straight, President Obama would like to see the Saints win it all next Sunday. Michelle, on the other hand, is excited about checking out Peter Townsend and the Who at halftime. Or as she put it to her hubby the other day, "Barack, can you hear me"? That's it Tommy fans, enjoy Super Bowl Sunday and we'll catch you on the winner's podium. Aloha, mahalo and later, Archie Manning fans.

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